


i think we’re okay

by ghxstlvke, xeuphorics



Category: Harry Potter - Fandom, Julie and the Phantoms, jatp - Fandom
Genre: AU, Charlie Weasley - Freeform, F/F, F/M, Harry Potter - Freeform, Julie and the phantoms - Freeform, Love Triangle, M/M, OC, Original Characters - Freeform, Weasleys, julynn - Freeform, nick and julie, remus lupin - Freeform, sirius black - Freeform, willex
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2021-01-13
Updated: 2021-02-22
Packaged: 2021-03-09 18:33:30
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings, Graphic Depictions Of Violence, Major Character Death
Chapters: 7
Words: 27,031
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/27770791
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/ghxstlvke/pseuds/ghxstlvke, https://archiveofourown.org/users/xeuphorics/pseuds/xeuphorics
Summary: JATP x Hogwarts au•Anahera Sincaid, a seventh year Ravenclaw, and Estella Griffin, a sixth year Hufflepuff, are best friends with Julie Molina and Flynn Adeyemi and attend the Hogwarts School of Witchcraft and Wizardry together.But after Hera and Stella meet Sunset Curve, a Hufflepuff boy band that practices in the Hogwarts ballroom, and Dirty Candi, a girl group that all consist of Slytherins..they find their world turned upside down.•Two years later, both Hera and Stella have graduated from Hogwarts but find themselves back as part of the faculty. Drama has ensued and, when the old gang gets back together, that’s when all hell breaks loose and the Battle of Hogwarts begins.
Relationships: Julie/Flynn, Julie/Nick, OC/Charlie Weasley, OC/Luke, OC/OC, Oc/Carrie, Original Female Character/Orginal Male Character, Willie/Alex
Comments: 2
Kudos: 6





	1. hogwarts alumni 1996

these are the year seven and year six students of hogwarts in the year of 1995-1996

**_year seven_ **

**anahera sincaid**

house - _ravenclaw_

hair color - _dark red_

eye color - _navy blue_

fc - _ellie bamber_

nickname - _hera_

**lucas patterson**

house - _hufflepuff_

hair color - _chocolate brown_

eye color - _ocean_ _blue_

nickname - _luke_

**alexander mercer**

house - _hufflepuff_

hair color - _golden blond_

eye color - _forest green_

nickname - _alex_

**reginald peters**

house - _hufflepuff_

hair color - _pitch black_

eye color - _mightnight brown_

nickname - _reggie_

**william schuyler**

house - _gryffindor_

hair color - _inky black_

eye color - _coffee brown_

nickname - _willie_

**ladan viziri**

house - _gryffindor_

hair color - _raven black_

eye color - _dark brown_

fc - _xolo maridueña_

nickname - _laddie_

_•  
_

**_year six_ **

**estella griffin**

house - _hufflepuff_

hair color - _deep brown_

eye color - _milk chocolate_

fc - _kaylee bryant_

nickname - _stella_

**julie molina**

house - _ravenclaw_

hair color - _cocoa brown_

eye color - _mahogany_

**flynn adeyemi**

house - _slytherin_

hair color - _blue black_

eye color - _umber brown_

**carrie wilson**

house - _slytherin_

hair color - _strawberry blonde_

eye color - _caramel_

**nicolas danforth-evans**

house - _gryffindor_

hair color - _toffee blond_

eye color - _electric blue_

nickname - _nick_

**angelica mercer**

house - _ravenclaw_

hair color - _golden blond_

eye color - _forest green_

fc - _lilia buckingham_

**melodania oceanus**

house - _slytherin_

hair color - _inky black_

eye color - _ocean blue_

fc _\- grace phipps_

nickname - melody 


	2. i. - settling in

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> hera's pov written by ghxstlvke, stella's pov written by xeuphorics

**Ren·ais·sance**

**/ˈrenəˌsäns/**

**" a revival or renewed interest "**

**•  
  
**

_**September 1, 1995**_

_**Friday** _

**•**

_**h.s.** _

Another year, another first day of Julie and I waiting for Stella and Flynn to get on the platform.

"You'd think after six years, they'd have it to a science," Julie says as she looks at her watch for the tenth time in the past minute,"They get slower every year."

It was true. Last year, they got there ten minutes before the train was taking off..now, it was about eight minutes 'til and I was trying my hardest not to freak out.

"Maybe next year they'll miss it," I began tapping my foot on the floor, the sound echoing across the empty space,"Good thing I won't be here to anxiously wait anymore."  
I bumped my shoulder onto Julie's in a joking way and she gave me a slight grin but she looked even more worried as the seconds ticked on.

Julie messed with her blue and bronze striped tie that signified that she was in Ravenclaw, the same house I resided in as well, rolling and tugging at it with anxiety until she suddenly perked up,"Finally!"

I looked in the direction of where she was staring and saw Stella and Flynn in their early morning glory. Yet, they somehow still looked fabulous as they ran across the platform with a quickness I was shocked to see from them.

"We're coming!" Flynn announced, scaring some of the first years she was zooming by. Flynn got to us first with Stella walking behind, dragging her feet about a hundred feet before but Flynn never noticed.

"You do know we have," I looked at my watch,"six minutes to get on the train, right?"  
"At least we got here quicker than Fred and George."

That was very true and I was concerned to look around and not see them anywhere in sight,"Well, damn it."

"Should you go find them?" Stella asked worriedly like she knew what I was thinking..they were off somewhere causing trouble to who knows what.

I shrugged,"I may be Head Girl but Fred and George aren't my territory, remember?" I had learnt my lesson with dealing with them but at least they knew now that if I told them to stop, they'd instantly stop due to..certain circumstances.

"Yeah but-"

"Guys," Julie whined and we all turned to her,"we have four minutes, we have to go."

We nodded as they waited for me to go first, apparently they treated me like I was royalty since I was bestowed with the title of Head Girl over the summer but it still made me roll my eyes every time they insisted, in a sarcastic way, that I go first or they always have to open doors for me or just anything that was done for the Queen every time we hung out during summer break.

Today was no different as I groaned and they followed like ducks in a row behind me.

We entered the train, found their compartment, and I turned around,"Okay, I have to go to the Head Girl and Boy compartment since we're about take off so I'll see you guys when we get to Hogwarts."

Stella still stood at the door since she had to the Prefect compartment in the same car as mine, we both waved goodbye to Flynn and Julie before walking towards our compartments.

"So, do you know the other Prefects?" I inquired as we pushed past trollies and other students trying to find empty compartments before the train was on its way.

"Just Ron, Hermione, and Wayne." Ron and Hermione I expected..well, more Hermione than Ron but Wayne? The guy that everyone in Hufflepuff found annoying? Stella always complained about how he liked her in a romantic way..oh, if only he knew.

"What about you? Do you know the Head Boy?"

I shook my head,"Some Hufflepuff, I don't even remember his name. I think it started with "A"."

"Well, whoever it is, I hope he puts a stop to all the midnight common-room band practices this one band has been having," She groaned and rubbed her eyes.

Last year, there was supposedly this underground Hufflepuff boy band that practiced every other night in the common-room, it really irritated people but no one ever said anything to them.

"Do you know the band members?"

"Yeah, they're all seventh years so maybe you'll know them this year. I don't really remember their names but I think the drummer was-"

The train suddenly began to lurch forward and caused Stella and I to stumble into the wall and almost fall over each others' feet.

"Geez, you'd think they'd get better every year but they're just worse," Stella grumbled as she started her way towards her compartment door.

"Hey, kind of like you and Flynn's time schedule getting to the platform."

"Ha ha, very funny," she opened the door and I waved at Ron and Hermione.

They waved back and I yelled to Stella as I began walking away,"See you at Hogwarts!"

"You too, Hera!"

I eventually found my compartment a few doors down, I opened it to see and blond haired boy with Hufflepuff robes on. He whipped his head around and gave me a slight grin,"Hi."

"Hello," I put my stuff in the overhead before I sat across from him,"I'm Anahera Sincaid."

"Oh yeah, I read your name in the announcement for the Head Girl and Boy," I suddenly felt bad for not remembering his name,"I'm Alex Mercer."

I almost sighed in relief but I just gave him a wide smile,"Nice to meet you."

"You too, Anahera."

"Oh, just Hera is fine. The only people who call me Anahera is my mom and the professors," I let out a bit of a laugh to release the tension and he laughed too, making me relieved that he actually was listening.

We talked for awhile after that, talking about our experiences in our houses and how exciting our last year was going to be.

"Yeah, my best friend is a Hufflepuff actually," I said as we had been talking about our friends from different houses.

"Oh, who is it?"

"Estella Griffin, she's a sixth year."

"Oh!" He perked up,"She comes to our band practices. Brown hair, right?"

"Uh...yeah..." My mind began to wander as he kept talking,"I don't mean to interrupt but, uh.."

He stopped his sentence but seemed eager to know what was on my mind.

"You said "band practices"..are you in a band?"

"Yup! Sunset Curve! We started it last year because Dirty Candi is getting a little much so we thought we'd bring punk rock into the Hogwarts scene," he sounded so excited talking about his band.

I listened as he told me about how he plays drums, talking about how there's only three other members beside him,"There's Luke, he plays guitar and our lead singer, I think you and him would get along! Then there's Reggie, our bassist, a little aloof but he's a great guy. And, finally, Bobby, our rhythm guitarist, he's a very keeps-to-himself kinda guy but still cool and the only one of us who is in a different house. He's in Slytherin."

I nodded as I listened to him but then I couldn't help but ask,"You guys wouldn't happen to have practice in the Hufflepuff common-room..?"

"Yeah, actually, and we do it at night since we aren't really ready to have people hear our stuff yet."

I took in a sharp, discreet intake of breath as I pursed my lips,"Smart.."

And, in that moment, I knew that this guy was going to be a handful.

**•**

**Re·a·wak·en**

**/rēəˈwākən/**

**"emerge or cause to emerge again; awaken again."**

**•**

_**s.g.** _

After another exhausting train ride on the Hogwarts Express and helping all the first years across the great lake, I make my way towards the Hufflepuff table in the Great Hall.

I had changed into my Hogwarts robes on the train and buttoned my shiny Prefect badge next to my tie.

I sit down next to Wayne Hopkins, the sixth year male Prefect. He presents a small smile at me, and I return it. Wayne makes it very well-known that he has some sort of romantic feelings for me. I (unfortunately in his case) don't recuperate those feelings.

Before Wayne can strike a conversation with me, I turn my attention to the professor's table, curious to see who our new defense against the dark art's professor is. Every year, we get a new defense professor. I'm not sure why no one stays, but it's been like this every year since I've been here. My personal favorite professor was my fourth-year professor, Professor Lupin. I wonder how he is.

He always said I reminded him of one of someone with who he went to school. I'm still not sure if that was a good or a bad thing.

My eyes scan across the table. I notice that Hagrid isn't there anymore, but our old care of magical creatures professor is. Interesting. Then, I notice a woman, who is dressed in all pink. I'm assuming she must be our new defense against the dark arts professor. Great! It'll be nice to have more women professors.

I don't pay much attention to the sorting ceremony that is taking place. Instead, I look over at the end of the Hufflepuff table, where I could hear whispering and laughter. I spot a boy with black hair, messy brown hair, and a boy with blond hair. I immediately recognize the blond as Alex Mercer, a seventh-year prefect. He may be head boy, actually. I have no clue who the other two are, however. It's beyond me how I've gone to school for six years with these boys, while also being in the same house as them but I don't know their names.

It dawned on me that they are the boys in the band when I overheard the brunette whispering about how they were going to perform in the common room later. How could I forget?! I mentally smack myself.

I then proceed to pull my wand out from the pocket in my robe and with a flick of it, I did a spell that caused Hera's (who is all the way across the hall at the Ravenclaw table) hair to flip as if a gust of wind had blown on it. This is something Hera and I came up with years ago, it's our way of getting each other's attention when neither of us are near. Hera turned and looked at me with the most annoyed look as I had interrupted her from watching the sorting. 'What?' She mouths.

'That's them!' I mouth and point to the boys. 'The band!' I flick my wrists up and down like I'm playing the drums to indicate that I'm saying 'band.' Hera nodded before turning back to face the other Ravenclaws. I scrunch my nose at her in return.

I look back at the ceremony, seeing that it had been completed and that we have five new Hufflepuff's at the end of our table. I give a reassuring smile to one who had looked over at me. I'll have to introduce myself to them later. I look up at the podium, to see Professor Dumbledore, our headmaster, had walked up behind it.

I don't pay attention to anything he says that's a repeat of what we hear every year, but I made sure to divert all my attention to him when he began speaking about the new staffing. Professor Umbridge is the name of our new DADA teacher. She interrupted Dumblefore mid-sentence. After I hear her speak for the first time, I take back any thought I had about liking her. I just felt something inside me that was yelling at me to dislike this new teacher.

Professor Umbridge goes on to explain something that made no sense to me at all. This is what happens when you spend your summers at an orphanage that doesn't let you have contact with the wizarding world.

I look behind me at the Slytherin table to see if Flynn can explain it to me, but instead of my eyes locking with Flynn, they lock with Carrie Wilson. Carrie is one of my least favorite people in this whole school. She also just happens to be the leader of Dirty Candi. Carrie tilts her head a little to the side when she sees me, I decide to ignore her and proceed to find Flynn, who was sitting a few places to the right of me.

"What does she mean?" I whisper to her after I get her attention.

"She means that the Ministry is interfering at Hogwarts."

"Is that because of what happened with Harry?" I ask before a shiver goes down my spine. I feel a cold gaze looking at us. I notice the Covington brother's eyeing us from the professor's table. Caleb and Malachi Covington, our ancient runes and muggle studies professors. I dislike both of them.

After what feels like ages of the speech and the feast itself, I eventually arrive at the common room. Alex tasked me with showing the first years how to enter the common room and where the dorms are. He said he had something he needed to do that was urgent. The first day as head boy and he doesn't do the most important job.

I see after all the first years left that Angelica Mercer, a Ravenclaw (Alex's sister too, I think), is in our common room. How on earth....?

I begin to approach her when I almost jump out of my skin from the sound of loud music starting to play.

I turn and see the boys playing in the middle of the common room. So that's what they were talking about at dinner. I place myself on the couch and listen to them play. They're playing a song I had heard them sing before. Watching them play is like watching a dance scene from a movie. You can see how much the music takes over when they play, their bodies all playing their instruments as if it was a daily task.

I grin when the black hair bassist walks over to me while playing his base before he breaks out into song.

When their song reaches its peak, the whole common room erupts into applause. It's nice to see some life in the common room. When everyone left last year, the common room had been nothing but quiet for days my Hufflepuff ex-boyfriend, Cedric Diggory, was supposedly murdered by Lord Voldemort. I don't know much about Voldemort, as I had never grown up hearing about him. I suppose I could ask Flynn one day as she's a pureblood.

I wasn’t fully over Cedric’s death, but it wasn’t affecting me as much as it once was. At the time, I felt as if my whole world fell apart, and it did, but I had people to help me through it. Some nights are harder than others, but I try to make the most out of my days. 

I cheer at the band and walk over to them, wanting to tell them my thoughts on the song. "Well? How were we?" The lead guitarist asked.

"Amazing.. but I think you probably woke up the first years." I look over at Alex, who was walking over to me from his place behind the drums.

The guitarist just grins at me, and I notice how Angelica appeared beside me. She high fives Alex. "That was awesome!"

"Okay, I wanna know how you got in here?" I look over at her with a raised eyebrow.

"I'm a Ravenclaw," She shrugs.

"Which is what common room you should be in," Alex points out, "But thank you for coming."

Angelica smiles cheekily at him. "I didn't come here for you. I came here for Luke and Reggie." She does a handshake with the other two boys, and I could see there that the three of them are close.

When Angelica finishes, she looks over at Alex, whos giving her a look. "Okay, you can go now, before I take away house points," He threatens but I can tell he's joking.

Angelica gasps. "You wouldn't!"

"I would."

The sister puts her hands up in defense. "Okay, okay! I'm going now!" She announces before exiting the common room.

I fully turn my attention back to the boys. I must have a weird look on my face because Luke's face fell. "You're not going to take away house points from us, right?" He asks and glances down at my Prefect pin.

Oh, it must have been my resting bitch face.

"Of course not. One, I can't take points away from Alex, and two, why would I take points away from my own house when I liked the music I heard?"

Luke smiles at me again, along with Reggie and Alex. The fourth member of their band hadn't been present.

"Good show, guys, but I'm going to bed now," I tell. We all wish each other goodnight and I head up the stairs to my dorm.

I can already tell that this year is going to be a very different experience than the previous ones.


	3. ii. - first class

**Ac·qui·si·tion**

**/akwəˈziSH(ə)n/**

**"the learning or developing of a skill, habit, or quality:"**

**•  
**

_**September 4, 1995**_

_**Monday** _

**•**

_**s.g.** _

I decided the next day to wake up a bit earlier than usual. Mostly it was because I couldn't sleep due to excitement and nervousness. This happened everywhere regardless of the fact that I've been at this school for six years.

I climb out of bed and see the rest of my dormmates still sleeping. I quietly grab all my showering necessities and head out of the dorms to the showers. The showers in the common rooms (well, at least in the Hufflepuff common room) have their own rooms. I push the door open to the girl's showers and noticed how I was the only one in the lavatory. Perfect.

I made sure not to use too much hot water while I showered. I changed into comfortable clothes as I didn't want to change into my robes until the very last minute. Those things are more uncomfortable than they look. I also put my hair up in curlers (We aren't allowed to use magic to fix our hair. A stupid rule in my opinion) as I wanted my hair curly for the first day.

On my wait out of the showers, a boy passed me, giving me the most confused look. When I asked him what he pointed at the curlers in my hair. I forget that not everyone here was raised in the muggle world.

I drop my stuff off back in my room and grab the book I was currently reading ( _The Dead Zone by Stephen King_ ) and head back to the main part of the common room. I sit myself down on the couch and begin to read. My goal is to have this book finished by October.

"Whatcha reading?" A boy asked me, causing me to almost fall off the couch. I was so deep into the world of the book that I didn't even notice more people had started piling into the common room. I look over to see the boy that the voice had come from. It was Alex.

"Merlin Alex, you scared me!"

"Sorry! Sorry- What on earth are those things in your hair?"

Not this again. "My curlers? They're curling my hair."

Alex looked confused. "Why not just use magic?"

"We aren't allowed. And I couldn't use an iron unless I wanted my hair brunt off," I said flatly.

"I see. Well, I'm about to head to breakfast with Luke and Reggie. Do you want to come with us?" Alex invited.

"Are you gonna ask me to join the band too?" I smiled at him.

"You know, I've been saying we need a female vocalist, but I think Luke likes the spotlight too much."

I chuckled at that. "I'll be back in ten minutes," I stated and grabbed my book before retreating back to my dorm.

The first step of getting ready for me is my hair. I take all the curlers out and put them neatly back into the bag they were originally in. I run my fingers through my hair to keep all the flyaways at bay before checking the time, hoping that didn't take too long.

' _8:10_ ' The clock read and I start to panic. I'm ten minutes late! We only ever get an hour to eat breakfast before classes start at 9, and it takes an extra ten to get up there. Maybe I can convince the boy band to eat in the kitchens or something.

I rush to put on my robes. I almost forgot to put on the sweater that goes over my tie. That would've been so embarrassing if I had forgotten. A _Prefect_ losing house points for not properly wearing her uniform.

My first class is potions with Professor Snape too. He would take off fifty points just out of spite.

I run back downstairs with my bag of books just in case I wouldn't be able to come back here and retrieve them after breakfast.

"We were about to send an owl to make sure you were okay," Luke told me after I approached them.

"How dramatic of you."

"Let's goooo!" Reggie whined. "Or all the good food will be gone."

"We're going we're going," Alex stated as we all made our way out of the common room.

I walked behind the group of them most of the way there. I didn't want to jump into their conversation.. I'm not exactly their _friend_.

"Estella!" My head shot up from my feet when I heard my name. It was Alex who called it. I quickly sped up to them as Alex began to ask me a question. "You never told me what you were reading earlier."

"Oh, it was The Dead Zone by Stephen King."

Luke practically jumped in the air and turned around to look at me. "Did you say, Stephen King? I love Stephen King!"

Reggie looked confused. "Who's Stephen King?"

Luke looked like he was about to explode. "Only the greatest horror writer of all time! How can you not know who he is?!"

"I don't know who he is either," Alex said but Luke didn't seem to hear him.

"I forget you're pureblood and uneducated. Speaking of, Estella what are you?"

"Excuse me?" I'm sure an offended look sprouted on my face.

"What Luke means, is what blood are you?" Alex inquired after probably seeing the look on my face.

That made my face fall. I hate explaining my situation in fear of being judged. "Um, well.. I don't know for sure."

"How do you not know?" Reggie asked.

He said it in a curious way but it still made me feel a bit stupid.

"I live in an orphanage."

Reggie made an 'O' shape with his mouth. "I'm sorry."

I shrugged. "Not really anything I can do about it. But yeah, that's that. I usually say I'm muggle-born." That's what seems most likely.

"Well, there's nothing wrong with being muggle-born," Alex said as a matter of factly. "Luke is muggle-born."

The boys and I continue to chit chat until we arrived at the great hall. Reggie almost knocked me off my feet trying to the food. After I got my plate, I reluctantly sat at the Hufflepuff table. No one is allowed to sit at the other tables until they have finished their mean.

I longingly look at the Ravenclaw table where Hera, Julie, and Flynn (who I assumed had finished eating) sat at. I'm positive that I won't get the chance to talk to them considering I'm a slow eater and I have class soon. Flynn noticed me looking at them and wiggled her eyebrows at me.

I raised my own eyebrow and she gestured towards the guys. Ah, she must've seen us walk in.

I don't know what she's thinking but none of them are my type.

The rush to potions class took almost too long. I was almost late but I thankfully got there with three minutes to spare. Professor Snape glared at me when I walked in, but he didn't say anything. I'm glad, even more glad after I spotted that we're having class with the Slytherins today.

That means Carrie is in here. Great. I hope Flynn is too.

I sit myself down next to Wayne as his seat was the only empty one. I pulled out some parchment and my quill and began to take note of everything Professor Snape said.

"Can anyone tell me what is brewing in the pot?" Professor Snape asked the class in the stern voice he always talks in.

A hand raised near me and I recognize it as Flynn's.

He called on Flynn with a hint of annoyance in his tone, like he only called on her because she's the only Slytherin student who raised her hand (Because how _horrible_ it would be to call on a Hufflepuff) "Ms. Adeyemi?"

"Amortentia, sir."

"And what does Amortentia do?"

"It's a love potion that seems different to everyone, but it creates obsession, not love."

"Ten points to Slytherin."

I jotted down what Flynn said. I wonder how she was able to tell what the potion was from where we're sitting.

"That's what we'll be making today. Hufflepuff's, going partner up with the Slytherins."

I get up and make my way towards Flynn, but Professor Snape stopped me. "Ms. Griffin? Go with Ms. Wilson," He instructed and I couldn't hold back my scoff.

"Five points from Hufflepuff! Aren't the two of you friends?"

We haven't been friends for two glorious years.

"Yes, we are, Professor Snape," I heard Carrie say sweetly. I rolled my eyes and walked towards Carrie, ignoring the piercing stares I was receiving from the other Hufflepuffs for losing us house points.

"Hello, Stella," Carrie greeted me when I laid the book on her desk.

I put on my most obviously faked smile. "Hello, Carebear. How are you?"

Carrie glared at me as I used the nickname she hates against her. "Look, just act like we're friends or else we'll both lose house points."

"Oh yes, because _I'm_ the one who ended the friendship."

"Shut up! I can't hear what he's saying," Carrie hissed at me and started collecting the ingredients for Amortentia. I turn my textbook open to the Amortentia page.

Carrie and I brewed the potion in silence, but that didn't stop us from intensely arguing with our eyes and hand gestures. We got even more odd stares when Carrie and reached over the table and loudly smacked something out of my hand.

It was a miracle we were even able to brew it successfully.

Professor Snape made his way to everyone's table, stopping at ours last.

Snape didn't say anything and just waited for us to smell the potion to see if it worked. I glance over at Carrie, who was giving me a commanding look. Guess I have to smell it.

I took a breath in above the potion, feeling overwhelmed with different smells.  
"I smell.. chocolate.. new books.. fallen leaves.. and-"

The last scent smelt like Dior perfume. A strong scent of flowers with a hint of citrus.

Oh my God.

"And firewhiskey." I lie.

Snape turned his attention to Carrie, who had started stating what she smelt.. But I was too overwhelmed with thoughts to listen.

_Why the hell did I smile Carrie's perfume?_

**•**

**Pre·sump·tion**

**\ pri-ˈzəm(p)-shən \**

**"a ground or reason for presuming or believing"**

**•**

_**h.s.** _

I woke up to the sound of people screaming.

I sat straight up in my bed, seeing my dormitory had also been awoken as the three other girls rubbed their eyes and looked around. Glad it wasn't me that heard it.

I swung my legs off the bed in a flash,"I'll be right back," I said as I ushered myself to the common room.

"What the _hell_ are you guys-?"

" _WATCH OUT_!"

I couldn't even register who said the outburst but I yelped as a what looked like a fireball whooshed past my head and bounced off the wall behind me onto the ceiling and continued to zip through the room.

"What is _that_?!" I inquired as I ducked my head, avoiding it as it was only a hair away from burning my hair off my head.

I covered my ears with my hands, the screams and whizzing noises from the item making my head hurt.

Eventually, I had enough and realized no one else was going to do anything as I took my wand out, aimed as quickly as I could, and yelled out fast and with my whole chest," _Eatenus exstinxisti!_ "

Right on the spot, a white flash hit the fireball and it extinguished, falling to the floor with a "thump", and revealed itself to be a rubber ball.

People stood around it in a circle and I walked between them to see what it was. It was yellow and orange striped, having a certain logo in the center of it that made me want to scream.

I picked it up and read the words written on it with a grimace on my face.

_Weasleys' Wizard Wheezes._

I closed my eyes, sighing as I tightened my grip on it, before I turned to the crowd surrounding me.

"Who brought this in here?" I held up the ball between my right thumb and forefinger, making sure they could see it and possibly point me to a culprit.

People were awkwardly quiet as most of them were first years who had no idea who most of the people here were at all so I glanced over to the others. That's when I saw someone try to slip out of the room.

"Angelica Mercer."

I crossed my arms as I saw her wince, she turned around and faced me with an awkward smile,"Yes, Hera?"

"Follow me, please."

She pursed her lips with embarrassment as I lead her to my dormitory. The other girls in there had left so I closed the door and turned to her.

"You know, I love the twins with my entire life but, Angelica..." I held the ball up in the palm of my hand so she could see it, her eyes flew to the floor,"really? From their shop?"

"Technically," I furrowed my eyebrows,"I didn't buy it from them."

"How did you get it then?"

"One of Alex's friends gave it to me."

"And why would they?"

She bit her bottom lip as she rubbed the back of her neck to relieve the tension of the situation,"See..I always like to make Alex's friends have a hard time so I forced him to get me something from their shop and then I would, quote-on-quote, like him."

"And..who was this again?" I blinked in confusion, not even sure why she'd even do such a thing.

"Luke Patterson."

That's when my head exploded in a headache, remembering the name when Alex was telling me about his band.

Luke was the lead guitarist and singer.

"So..if I ask this Luke guy if you got it from him...he'd say yes?"

"Yup!" But I could tell she was lying by the way she kept looking around like there were cameras that I could whip out to prove the evidence against her.

I nodded,"Fine, you may go. We have classes in," I glanced at my alarm clock on my side table and saw it read '7:30',"an hour and thirty minutes. You should go get ready."

She nodded and zipped out of the room, making me roll my eyes. It was fortunate for Angelica that I loved her like a sister and basically adopted her or else I'd punish her with cleaning the burnt spots all over the common room and cleaning it in general for the next two weeks.

Instead, I'd have to do it. Or have the Ravenclaw Prefects help me.

I groaned as I stared at the ball in my hand, deciding to bring it with me to question Luke.

That is, if I even saw him today.

•

Breakfast went by too fast as I rushed my way towards Ancient Runes. I had to make a stop along the way to show some of the first years where certain classes were before I sprinted across the halls.

I knew I wasn't supposed to do that but I was running late..I just hoped I didn't get caught since I was, you know, Head Girl.

I eventually found the classroom, straightening my robes before I pushed open the door.

Luckily, I wasn't late as I looked around at the people at tables. I noticed they were pairs of a Ravenclaw and...Hufflepuffs.

_Perfect._

I looked around for a seat as I suddenly heard,"Hera!" I recognized the voice as Alex.

I turn to see him and I smile, noticing two guys with him. One with black hair sat in the seat next to Alex while the brunet stood up but leaned on the table by the palms of his hands.

It didn't take a rocket scientist to figure out who they were.

"Hera, this is Reggie and Luke," he introduced them and I put on a smile as I held out a hand to shake theirs.

"Hiya, I'm Reggie," Reggie shook my hand vigorously, it made me wish I was as energized as him.

"Nice to meet you," I gave him a wide smile before turning to the brown haired guy,"You must be Luke."

He grinned, taking my hand and, instead of shaking it, kissing it dramatically,"And you, Hera."

I raised my eyebrows as I looked at Alex,"Oh yeah, a real charmer."

"What can I say? I'm a ladies man," he propped an elbow on the table as he leaned even farther in it, Reggie knocked it out from underneath him and Luke nearly slammed his head on the table because of it.

"Yeah, a real ladies man," Alex chuckled as him and Reggie laughed uncontrollably.

Luke huffed as he frowned, crossing his arms.

I suddenly got a bright idea as I noticed an empty table in the back,"Hey, Luke," he perked up when I said his name,"why don't we sit together this class? It'll be fun."

"Uh, yeah, sure!" He followed me to the back of the room, glancing back at Alex and Reggie like he couldn't believe it but I just rolled my eyes as I sat down.

He sat next to me and I instantly inquired,"Do you know Angelica Mercer?"

"Alex's sister?" He sounded confused,"Yeah, why?"

"She said you gave her this," I pulled the rubber ball out of my robe pocket,"but I don't think so."

"Uh, yeah, I've never seen that before in my life."

He stared at it and asked,"May I?"

I threw it up slightly in the air so he caught it,"Knock yourself out, just don't say the magic word to make it start flying around."

"What is it?"

"The spell for igniting."

"Oh? You mean _incendio_?"

My eyes widened as I put my hands over it in his hands, nearly screaming but instead I hissed,"Idiot!"

But, nothing happened.

My eyes relaxed as I took my hands off it and sighed,"Merlin, Luke, you shouldn't have said that."

"You forget that you need your wand to be able to do magic, I'm not that dumb but maybe you are..." he make a clicking noise with his tongue and I scoffed.

Yet I couldn't keep a laugh from slipping out.

It was a sarcastic laugh but it was still a laugh.

"That's ironic coming from a Hufflepuff teenage boy, telling a Ravenclaw Head Girl that she's _dumb_."

"There's a difference in stupidity and dumbness. You just have to find them," he said with confidence as he crossed his legs and arms, leaning his back against the wall in a smooth way.

I scoffed with disbelief,"You really are cocky, aren't you?"

"That's me," he smiled and I felt a strange urge to slap him.

But I held back because there was something about him that I liked. Something about him made me wonder what else he had going on in his mind at the moment.

"You can really see the gears turn in your head, you know," he threw the ball up in the air and caught it, staring up at it as he did.

I blinked when I realized I had been staring at him,"Thanks. But I doubt you have any gears to turn at all."

"Oh? Is that so?" He reached into his robes for something and I instantly knew what it was when he parted his lips and whispered," _Incendio_."

The fireball flew to life and started hitting the stone walls surrounding us, making all the students gasp and cower in fear of being hit.

"You really are an idiot!" I put my arms over my head in an attempt to save myself.

"Nope, just trying to prove a point," he grinned like it was the funniest thing ever,"My gears were turning this entire time with the temptation of igniting that thing."

"Yeah? And how's that working out?" It hit our table and I let out a shriek before covering my face with my hands.

Luke let out a loud laugh before an echoing boom of a voice yelled out," _EATENUS EXSTINXISTI_!"

The ball made a "zip" noise before the fire went out and it fell to the floor in the center of the room.

We all looked to the front of the room to see Professor Covington. Well, one of the Covington professors.

There were two, brothers who taught completely different classes. This one, the older, more charismatic one was our Ancient Runes professor .

Caleb Covington wore all black and a cape twenty-four seven but did it in a way that when Snape walked by, Snape was inferior to him in every way.

Everything that Caleb Covington did dripped and oozed with glamour and allure. It was almost unreal when he walked into a room, he could make the entire room go pin drop silent.

To be honest, I had a crush on him when I was younger and, to this day, still thought he was the best looking professor here.

"Now that _that's_ been taken care of," he moved to his desk, picking up a small bag of what I guessed would be runes,"let's get to the lesson, shall we?"

He put on his signature top hat before he started his lecture, completely ignoring what had just happened.

I watched intently, making sure to pay attention so I could have a bigger future but it was hard to focus when Luke was staring at me in my peripheral vision.

I wanted to ask him multiple times during class why he was but I didn't want to interrupt Professor Covington's lecture.

It wasn't until class ended when I was packing up my notes that I looked up to ask Luke..but he was gone.

I looked to the door to see Alex, Reggie, and Luke leaving together.

It only took a fraction of a second for me to see that Luke had take a glance back to our table, giving me a wink before he left the room completely.

I couldn't help myself as I rolled my eyes, slinging my bag over my shoulder before I left to get to my next class.


	4. iii. - annoyance and headaches

**Af·fil·i·a·tion**  
 **\ə-fi-lē -ā-shən\**  
 **"The act of being closely associated with a particular person or group"**  
•  
 ** _September 8, 1995_**  
 ** _Friday_**  
•  
 ** _h.s._**

I don't even know how I got to the Great Hall for breakfast this morning, I was literally zombie from the past few days.

I hated being Head Girl with a passion but at least it gave me perks and authority over the younger years because, damn, they really made stupid decisions.

I had classes mostly with Hufflepuffs the past few days and it drove me nuts because Luke kept insisting to sit with me every class. Good thing Alex caught the hint and sat with me every time we had a class yesterday.

"I'm sorry he's so annoying," Alex had said when we went to do our rounds as Head Girl and Boy,"He's just trying to be friendly but it comes off as...well..."

"Cocky? Hyper? Asshole-like?"

"Yeah.."

I could tell Alex was trying just as hard as I was to be a good Head Person. We both were exhausted by the end of the first week and, here I was, on Friday. Trying not to fall asleep as I ate my toast with a stoned look on my face.

"Man, you look rough," I turned slightly when I felt someone sit next to me on the bench.

I almost whined when I saw Luke sitting there, grabbing a couple pieces of bacon as he stuffed them into his mouth.

"You have to be done eating in order to leave your table," I grumbled as I contemplated taking House points away. Good thing for him, I was too exhausted to even care.

"Well, technically," he looked around to find Alex and Reggie, motioning them to come over,"I was done."

"Hence the "was"."

"What the hell are you doing here?" Julie suddenly materialized and I thanked whatever god was above me,"You took my spot."

"Finders keepers," Luke grinned that dumb bitch ass grin he used when he was being condescending and I felt my blood start boiling.

"Ha ha, _move_ ," Julie was just as unamused as I was.

"Yeah, move over," Stella pushed him over and he almost fell off the bench backwards but his hands caught his fall.

Luke grunted,"You guys really don't like me, huh?"

"It's not that we don't like you but..." Julie looked him up and down, not finishing her sentence and I wanted to laugh.

"Mr. Patterson," we heard Professor Sprout nearly yell across the room,"get to your table this _instant_!"

I was happy to know I wasn't the only one getting rode up the wall with Luke's crap.

"Now who went and told on me?" Luke stood up from the bench but froze when he saw Alex standing behind him,"Oh."

""Oh" is what you're gonna be thinking when I take House points away for you annoying the Head Girl," Alex's arms were crossed as his foot tapped on the ground,"Go finish your bacon at the Hufflepuff table."

Luke groaned as he put the bacon in between his teeth, waved sarcastically, and dragged his feet over to the table. I let out a laugh when I saw Sprout scolding him as soon as he got there.

Julie sat to my left while Stella sat to my right, Stella stared at me for a few seconds before she thought everyone's thoughts out loud,"You're exhausted."

"Mmhmm." I took a bite of toast, not bothering to say anything else.

"You know you can give punishments to Luke, right?" Julie said as she took out her potions textbook and her scrolls for homework,"Get him to stay away from you?"

"And when," I made sure the pink devil herself wasn't in the room when I said,"Umbitch asks why I'm giving him unnecessary punishments? Then what?"

Julie and Stella nodded in unison and I groaned,"I just wish I could sleep."

"Take a day off," Stella requested,"I'm sure the professors would let you."

I looked at Stella with a crazy look,"Snape and Umbridge would rather die."

"Then they shall perish," Luke said as he sat down and nearly crashed into the bench across from me."

" _Merlin's beard_ , do you ever leave anyone _alone_?" I whined as I put my forehead on the table, closing my eyes and almost falling asleep. That was..until someone decided to yell, " _MAIL'S HERE_!"

I jerked up in my seat when something plopped directly in front of me. A creme color envelope with slight gold and bronze accents surrounding the letters that read,

 _To Anahera Venus Sincaid  
_ _From N.Scamander_

I turned it around as I saw a bronze and platinum swirled wax seal on the opening, a symbol of a dragon that I knew all too well was on the seal.

"Who's it from?" Julie looked up from her textbook.

"Newt again?" Stella asked and I nodded, I knew it was coming again.

"Newt who?" Luke butted in and I wanted so badly to say "not your business" but I just rolled my eyes.

"Newt Scamander," I sounded like it was no big deal because..it kinda wasn't to me.

"As in...the guy who wrote " _Fantastic Beasts And Where To Find Them_ "?" Luke almost sounded in awe.

"That's my uncle for you," I tried my hardest not to break the seal as I opened the letter, knowing what was going to be inside but still felt the need to,"Well, technically great uncle but that's besides the point."

" _What_?" Luke was baffled, completely awestruck unlike anyone else I've ever told.

I sighed with annoyance,"He's my grandfather's brother. My grandfather is Theseus Scamander who had a daughter named Kore Scamander, my mother, and married Aidoneus Sincaid, my father. Anymore questions about my heritage or did you comprehend any of that?"

I didn't mean to snap at him but I was on my last nerve with him. He didn't seem phased though as he blinked and went,"That's actually so cool. Your great uncle is a legend."

"Yeah, yeah." I nodded as I pulled out a folded up paper that read,

_"Dear my lovely niece,_

_I hope this letter finds you in good health.  
_ _I have recently been informed that some of my colleagues in Romania have been opening up spots for their Dragon Program.  
_ _I understand you know one of my colleagues's, Charles Weasley's, brothers, Fred and George. They have told him all about you and, because of our connection as relatives, has offered to put you highly on the list for consideration if you apply.  
I_ _cannot wait to see you this summer, you will remain in my thoughts until I see you next._

 _Love,  
_ _Uncle Newt"_

I groaned. Stella raised her eyebrows,"Asking you to apply for the program _again_?"

"That's like three times in the past two months," I looked at my watch, jerking out of my seat quickly,"I have class in ten minutes!"

"Did you ever decide what you're gonna do about the program?" Stella asked as I gathered my stuff.

I shrugged,"I don't really have time to think about it at the moment so.."

Luke suddenly furrowed his eyebrows,"What class do you have next?"

"Muggle Studies."

"Oh, me too," he stood up as he gathered his stuff up as well,"let's walk together?"

He didn't sound as annoying at the moment, he actually went from being super hyper to being extremely calm. I actually didn't mind if he was going to act like that the entire time.

Plus, I didn't really have a choice.

"Uh, sure," I slung my bag on my shoulder,"We gotta go."

I turned and started walking away, not even waiting for him to come around the giant table, before he eventually sprinted next to me when we got to the hallways.

"So, getting a lot of pressure from family, huh?" Luke inquired, actually curious,"You seemed kind of annoyed when that letter came in."

I took in a deep intake of breath,"It's not really pressure, it's just that...I'm not sure if I even want to do it anymore. Sure, a couple years ago when I was in like fifth year but now? I have no idea what I want to do."

I don't know why I was confiding in him about this, he annoyed me to no end but, here I was, telling him about my future plans.

Yet, he didn't seem critical at all, instead he nodded and said with a solemn tone,"You know..I get what that's like."

"You? Luke the cocky bastard?"

He let out a slight chuckle,"Yes. Even I."

"Okay, what's your story then?" I watched his face as he instantly went from silly to serious, it was like I could finally see the gears in his head that I always thought were nonexistent.

"Well..my parents don't really have that high expectations for me. They always thought that if I came here, I'd not want to go to college and stuff but.." he sighed, rubbing the back of his neck,"I hate to tell them so but I'd really like a career in the wizarding world. I mean, it's so cool how there's an underground system underneath all the muggles and they just don't even know."

He chuckled lowly,"I think it's so awesome I'm a part of that and I want to stay in it, you know?"

It was shocking to hear this stuff from him, it was like I was seeing a whole knew side of him that I somehow tapped into. It was odd but it made me appreciate him.

"Plus, I don't think they'd like the fact I'm in a rock band," he grinned and I couldn't help but notice this grin was different.

It was a genuine, happy grin that showed he was showing his true self and not the jerky version he had been trying to portray.

And, just like that, I realized I wasn't as tired as I was before and the headache that always showed up when he was with me was gone.

•  
 **achieve**  
 **\ ə-ˈchēv \**  
 **"to carry out successfully"**  
•  
 ** _September 11, 1995_**  
 ** _Monday_**  
•  
 ** _s.g._**

The past week has given me the biggest headache of my life as I had tried to sort out the unresolved feelings I apparently have for Carrie.

I couldn't tell anyone about them, either. Being gay in the 90s is a big no-no. Hera is the only one who knows about me having any feelings towards girls, but if I told her I apparently have feelings for Carrie according to a love potion, she would probably tuck me into my bed with soup telling me to eat it until I feel better.

It also doesn't help that it's my time of the month and everyone and everything is pissing me off.

I decided to stop thinking about Carrie. What good would thinking about her even do? She hates me and I hate her.

Now, Wayne and I are doing the nightly patrol of the nearest corridors to the Hufflepuff common room. I had offered to Alex to let me do it as a way to clear my head. I hadn't been expecting Wayne to come, but he's good company.

Wayne had mentioned something about how the Hufflepuff quidditch team are holding seeker tryouts soon- which gained my full attention.

"Are you trying?" I ask.

Wayne shrugged slightly. "I might. I'm a better keeper than I am a seeker.. but I doubt Herbert is going to give up his position anytime soon."

I chuckle at that. Herbert Fleet is the Hufflepuff keeper and team captain. He's had the keeper position since his third year.

"You know... You've played seeker before.." Wayne starts.

I've played seeker _once._ I filled in for Cedric during a game once, and I didn't even catch the snitch.

"Just that one game that we didn't even win!"

"We wouldn't have won even if you did catch it! Slytherin won from the number of points."

"And because Malfoy kept trying to throw me off my broom," I point out.

"Well, Malfoy is.. Malfoy! All I'm saying is that you should try. You're good at flying as well."

“I don’t know, Wayne, I think it might be too soon after Cedric..”

“He would be happy with you playing seeker.”

I debated my options for a bit before saying a simple 'We'll see' as our rounds came to a close.

•

The next day, I find Hera in the Prefect hangout room after classes.

"Hera!" I announce and rush over to her.

"Hello to you too," She looks up at me from her book.

"What would you say if I told you I wanted to try out for the seeker position on the Hufflepuff quidditch team?"

Hera blinked at me before a slack expression appeared on her face. "Uh-huh.. Why?"

"I don't really know," I state, honestly. "I just have this feeling in my gut that I should. And I quite enjoy playing."

Hera nodded suspiciously. "It's up to you.. But you know the reputation seekers have at Hogwarts right?"

I nod. "Yes. I'm perfectly aware of that."

"Are you two talking about the quidditch tryouts?" A warm voice says from behind me. I turn around to see that it's Alex.

"Stella wants to try out for seeker," Hera inquires.

Alex smiles brightly at me. "My boyfriend plays beater for the Gryffindor team, he can give you some pointers if you want."

Boyfriend? Thank God I'm not the only gay here.

"Who's your boyfriend?" Hera asking curiously while returning his bright smile with one of her own.

"He's here somewhere," Alex says and looks around. I look around too as if I know who Alex's boyfriend is.

Alex's face then lights up when a boy with black hair walks up to our mini-group. The black-haired boy also smiles and I swear I have never seen someone with more perfect teeth.

The boy wraps his arm around Alex and I look over at Hera, who was suddenly not smiling anymore.

" _Him, Alex?_ Really?" Hera said coldly which made my brows draw together.

The boy laughed. "You're just mad because you can't get any."

If I had water, I probably would've choked on it.

"Let's just say my focus isn't on anybody right now," Hera responds.

I turn to the boy, who just looked amused by the whole situation. I extend my hand towards him.

"I'm Stella," I introduce and he gives me the same smile he had on his face when he walked over to us.

"Laddie."

"Nice to meet you. Alex says you're a beater but.. I've never seen you play."

Laddie smirked, "Then you haven't seen real talent."

I couldn't hold back my laugh. Now I get why Hera doesn't like him. "Got a bit of an ego, don't we? Remember who won last time Gryffindor played Hufflepuff?"

"Okay, that wasn't a fair game."

"I know it wasn't, but we asked you guys for a rematch, and you lot said no." I point out.

Laddie looked like he was about to hex me, but Alex stopped him before he could. " _Laddie!_ Maybe you can give Stella some pointers for her tryout?"

I forced a smile, Alex was only trying to help, after all. "Thanks, but no thanks. I can do it myself," I said sweetly before looking at my wrist as if I had a watch there. "Would you look at the time! Gotta fly, no pun intended. See you later, Hera," I say all in a rush before speeding out of the room, not daring to look back.

•  
 ** _September 16, 1995_**  
 ** _Saturday_**

I hadn't been able to sleep the previous night, even with the previous week of classes being exhausting. My nerves had gotten the better of me. I just hope my amount of sleep deprivation won't affect my ability to fly or find the snitch.

I put my hair in space buns and put on a Hufflepuff jersey with some leggings. I wasn't sure what the dress code for this thing is so that'll have to do.

I head to the great hall for breakfast and sit with Hera, Julie, and Flynn. They're all wearing their normal attire.

I love the weekends at Hogwarts usually. The weekends give me an excuse to sleep in or do things around the castle that I wouldn't usually get to do during the weekdays. Today was different as I had a busy day ahead of me.

Julie, Flynn, and Hera were having a conversation that I wasn't listening to, instead, I was playing with my food. (The students are allowed to sit wherever they want on the weekends, just not the weekdays).

"You okay?" I noticed Hera asked me and I looked over at her. "Yeah, just nerves."

"You're gonna do great, Stella," Flynn reassured me and I smile a little at her in gratitude.

There was another thing bugging me, though, but I couldn't figure out why this particular person's opinion of me bothered me so much.

"It doesn't help that I might've made an enemy on Tuesday."

Hera sighed. "If you're talking about Laddie, don't give him the time of day."

"I don't care that it's him, I just don't like when people have negative feelings about me, even if I can't stand people with egos."

Angelica Mercer suddenly joined our conversation. "Are you guys talking about Laddie Viziri?"

Julie nodded at her.

"Laddie's really nice when you get to know him," Angelica began. "I'm not gonna deny that he's very egotistic though."

Laddie's big ego definitely didn't help me at the tryouts. As soon as I had arrived with Hera, Julie, and Flynn (who had all come for emotional support), Laddie and Alex were sitting at the stands. Now, as I'm waiting for tryouts to begin with my broom in my hand, I can overhear him and Hera arguing and Alex trying to stop their fight.

"I will take house points away from you! Don't test me, Laddie!" Hera threatens and I hold back my laugh.

There are four other people at tryouts. I was a little shocked, I had been expecting more, but I guess not a lot of people want to play seeker.. Don't blame them for that.

I recognize one of the people as Nathaniel Summerby, a seventh year. The other boy is a third-year whose name I can't remember, and then a girl who I recognize as the fifth year Prefect Hannah Abbot's friend.

Herbert walked up to the group of us with the rest of the quidditch team behind him. "Thank you all for coming!" He says enthusiastically.. maybe a little _too_ enthusiastically for four people. "We're looking for a seeker who has a good eye, obviously. Has everyone here played quidditch before?"

I keep my eye contact with Herbert as I nod.

"Great!" He beams. "The team and I are going to split up into teams, and two of you will be assigned to play seeker for a game, and then we'll switch out. The two who catch the snitch will play a game together and then the other two who don't. We'll announce who has the position tomorrow. You all got that?"

I nod again, feeling as if I'm about to throw up.

 _I can do it, I can do it_. I repeat to myself. Good vibes only.

"Okay, can I have... Estella and Nathaniel up first?"

I look over at the stands. Hera mouths 'Good luck', Alex gives me a thumbs up, and Laddie looks like he's about to critique my every move.

"Go, Stella!" Julie yelled and I beam at her.

Herbert assigns the rest of the team into teams and tells me I'll be playing on team 2. I mount myself on the school broom I'm borrowing and I fly up to join the rest of the team.

The game started quickly. I looked around for the snitch while also watching how elegantly all the chasers were being. A bludger started zooming at me and I shrieked and ducked.

The bludger thankfully only grazed one of my space buns, but now the bun was loose and I knew it would annoy me for the rest of the 'game.'

"Sorry!" The beater who had hit the bludger in my direction yelled and I told her it was okay.

I fly around a little and look over at Nathaniel, who had started driving. I dived after him, thinking he had spotted the snitch.

He flew towards the stands and when we got to them, he jerked his boom up. I quickly turned my broom so I wouldn't crash into the wall. He tricked me!

"Arse!" I groan and fly quickly away from the stands. I heard Laddie chuckling as I flew away. Good to know my failure amused him.

After another five minutes of endless searching, I finally spotted it. The snitch! I dove down towards it, speeding past the other players who had stopped to watch. I could hear Nathaniel flying behind me, but I paid him no mind.

_Just keep your attention on getting the snitch._

I extended my arm when I got close enough and felt it against my hand. I enclosed it around the snitch.

 _I caught it! I caught it!_ I celebrate to myself.

"Fantastic job Estella!" Herbert told me when I landed on the ground. "The two of you are free for a water break now."

I hand the snitch to Herbert who sent it back in the air again for the other two people's game. I fixed my lopsided bun and made a cup of water from the water bin that's on the side of the field.

Hera ran up to me from the edge of the stands. "That was amazing!"

I smile at her. "Thanks!" I say excitedly.

"So is that the end of the tryout?"

I shake my head. "One more game, then I'm done."

In the next game, I played against the fifth year girl. I noticed at the beginning of the game that she had a Nimbus 2001, which was _way_ faster than the cleansweep I'm currently on.

She ended up catching the snitch, but I wasn't upset. I was happier that I was able to catch it the first time around. I met the group at the end of the stands. Julie and Flynn were excitedly talking about what they had just witnessed when I approached.

"Good job," Alex tells me, and we high five.

"Thanks," I say and look over at Laddie who was right next to him.

Alex nudged him in the ribs and Laddie winced. "You were alright, yeah."

"Thank you, Laddie."

I walk over to Hera and the six of us leave the stands together.


	5. iv. - these scars darken

**an·guish**

**/ˈaNGɡwiSH /**

**"severe mental or physical pain or suffering."**

**•**

_**September 18, 1995** _   
_**Monday** _

**•**

_**s.g.** _

I found out I had made the quidditch team yesterday. I was pretty surprised considering everyone who was at tryouts did so well. A ton of people had congratulated me (which they didn't have to, but I would be lying if I said I didn't like the attention), and I just hoped there weren't any hard feelings between me and the other people.

My first class of the day today is Defense Against The Dark Arts, my absolute favorite class, but I couldn't help but feel nervous about it. Every year, we have a new teacher. There are rumors of a jinx on the position. According to more rumors, Harry Potter had already gotten detention with the new professor, Professor Umbridge.

I mean, Harry is prone to getting detention, but it's usually for being caught late, showing up late, things like that, and I haven't heard any word about any of that.

I enter the DADA classroom, seeing that we have it with the Ravenclaws today. I sit down next to Julie and sit my wand on the desk.

Professor Umbridge was sitting behind her desk, wearing all pink like she had been wearing on the first day. She had a very wide smile on her face, a little _too_ wide in my opinion.

"Hey," Julie says from beside me.

"Hi," I smile back at her as a greeting and she returns it.

"I heard you made the quidditch team! Congratulations!"

My smile grows. "Thanks."

Professor Umbridge tapped her wand on her desk to silence us. "Good morning, class!"

We all say _'good morning'_ as we had learned from other Professors that it's best to greet them back then to not do it.

"Wands away and quills out!" Professor Umbridge commands and I raise an eyebrow.

It's not unusual to not have our wands out, but usually every first-class we demonstrate with our wands to show the Professor what skills we're best at what we're worst at.

A few other students groaned as they probably thought it was odd as well.

Professor Umbridge pointed her small wand at the board and wrote the words ' _Defense Against the Dark Arts, A return of basic principles'_

 _... What?_ We learned the basic principles back in the first year.. Why do we need to learn them again?

Professor Umbridge began speaking about why this is what we're learning. Apparently, it's because our other teachers were 'disrupted and fragmented' about their teaching.

I don't agree with that. Sure, most of our DADA professors weren't the best, but I learned the most from Professor Lupin and Professor Hajime (Who was my first-year DADA professor).

"Please copy down the sentences I will be writing on the board," Umbridge directed as I pulled out parchment to take my notes.

Everything I copied seemed like an exact replica of what I copied in first year, but whatever. Maybe if I dug far enough I could find my first-year homework.

"Now, everyone take out your books and please read chapter 1 of _Defensive Magical Theory."_ Umbridge guided in a tone that proved she had said this guide-meant many times before.

I pulled my book out of my bag and began reading it.

 _Rubbish._ Every single thing I'm reading right now is _rubbish._

There was not a single thing in this book about using defensive spells. This call is literally called _Defense_ Againstthe Dark Arts.

I was about to say something but Angelica beat me to it.

"Um, this class is called Defense Against the Dark Arts, but there's not anything in here about using defensive spells?"

"This course is Ministry approved," Umbridge said in a fake sweet voice. "We will not be at risk in this class. Also, raise your hands please."

_But living in the wizarding world as a whole is risky?_

Angelica began to argue. "What if we get attacked and then we can defend ourselves?"

"You won't be attacked in my class, I can assure you. I understand that you've had an extremely dangerous Half-Breed teach this class, but I can-"

That's when I lost it.

I shot my hand up and Umbridge looked at me, plastering a fake smile onto her face. "Thank you for raising your hand, Ms.?"

"Griffin, Professor," I start. "Professor Lupin never hurt us. He was one of the best Defense teachers we've ever had, and it's not his fault he's a werewolf."

"Did I say it was his fault?"

"You called him a dangerous Half-Breed as if he _chose_ to be a werewolf. You have to be bitten to become a werewolf Professor, did you know that?" I didn't mean to say the last part aloud, but it earned me a few snickers from the class. I glanced over at Julie, who was sending me a warning look.

Umbridge looked flabbergasted. "I beg your pardon?"

"I beg _your_ pardon, Professor!" I stand up. "Professor Lupin _never_ hurt us. That's why he left! To make sure he wouldn't! It's people like _you_ and your prejudice and discrimination who make werewolves hate themselves! Now I understand-"

"Detention Ms. Griffin!" Professor Umbridge practically shouted and Julie pulled me back down in my seat.

" _As_ I was saying- Read chapter 1 of your books please, or I will not hesitate to give out more detentions."

I didn't even read my book. Instead, I look over at Angelica, who gave me a look that said she agreed with everything I said. She ended up passing me a note from right under Umbridge's nose.

 _'She's the one who passed the Anti-werewolf legislation,'_ It read and I felt my hatred for this woman growing even more.

The Anti-werewolf legislation was something I remember overhearing some students talking about. I ended up doing my own research on it to find out that it basically kept werewolves from getting jobs.

And it was this woman's fault.

When class ended after the long reading portion, I made my way up to Umbridge's desk.

"When's my detention?" I asked while holding onto the strap of my bag.

"Tonight at 5, and every night for the rest of the week," Professor Umbridge squeaks.

 _Every day this week?!_ I have quidditch practices, tests to study for! I decided I wouldn't protest. I didn't want to potentially get in even _more_ trouble.

"I expected better from you, Ms. Griffin," Umbridge continues. "You're a _Hufflepuff Prefect_ after all!" She points at my Prefect badge as if I didn't know it was there.

"Being a Hufflepuff Prefect doesn't really have anything to do with my views on werewolves, Professor.."

"Tonight at 5," Umbridge repeats before shooting at me. I take no time to hesitate and turn around, walking up to Julie and Angelica.

"What you said about werewolves is true," Angelica reassured me. "It's just.. a ton of people are closed-minded about that."

I parted ways with Angelica and Julie as they had a different class to head to. I had Charms next, so I began to make my way to the Charms classroom-

But then I ran into Carrie. Well, more like she ran up to me.

"Stella! I need to talk to you."

I stopped and raised an eyebrow. "About?"

"Well Dirty Candi is having a performance in the Slytherin common room on Wednesday and you were always the better one at the technical side of things. I was hoping you could help?"

I'm being forced to decline due to detention, but even if I didn't have it I wouldn't help her. Not after what she did to me..

But then I remembered the Amortentia, and that the potion basically gave away that I still have some unresolved feelings for Carrie that I need to sort out.

I sigh a little. "I would help you if I could, but I have detention that night."

Carrie searched my face to detect if I was lying. She furrowed her eyebrow. "You have detention? With who?"

"Professor Umbridge."

Carrie tilted her head. Why do I like it when she does that? Why do I like it when she looks at me like she's the one with all the power?

"That's new."

"Yeah, well," I breathe. "There's a lot of new things about me."

"Maybe I can learn some of those new things, then," Carrie stepped closer to me and I felt my breath hitch.

"I have class. I'm sorry Carrie," I mumble before running off to my Charms class.

I really need to get my feelings together soon.

**•**

After a long day of classes and finally having dinner, it was time for my detention with Umbridge. Hera wanted to meet me afterward, so I gave her the ' _Okay'_ before heading to the Defense Against the Dark Arts classroom.

As soon as I arrived, I saw Harry waiting outside her door. I forgot he had detention as well so I just awkwardly stand next to him.

He looked over at me, looking very confused. "What on earth do you have detention for?"

"I got mad at her calling werewolves 'Half-Breeds.'"

"That's understandable."

I nod slightly. "What about you?"

Harry looked me straight in the eye, "She thinks I was lying when I said I fought Voldemort."

I flinched a little at his name. But of course, she did. I know a ton of people who think Harry is lying about You-Know-Who, but I'm not one of those people. I knew Cedric, he was smart and quick. There was no way that the ' _game'_ killed him.

"I believe you," I tell him and knock on the door. The door swung open after I heard a sugary voice say "Come in."

Harry and I both walked in and I looked around, wanting to throw up from the sight of so much pink. No DADA Professor's office ever looked like this.

"Good even, Mr. Potter, Ms. Griffin."

"Good evening," I say nicely and sit down in a chair, Harry mimicking me.

"Professor Umbridge?" Harry spoke. "Before we start — I-I wanted to ask you a... a favor."

Umbridge's eyes narrowed at him. "Oh, yes?"

"Well- I'm on the Gryffindor quidditch team and- we have keeper tryouts on Friday.. I was wondering if I could.. skip detention that night.. and do it another night instead?"

Harry was bold for asking that, in my opinion. I didn't dare to ask if I could skip for my quidditch practices— I could see from the look on Professor Umbridge's face that her answer to Harry was going to be a _hard no._

I'll just have to talk with Herbert, I guess.

"Oh, no. Oh no, no, no. This is your punishment for spreading evil, nasty, attention-seeking stories, Mr. Potter. The same goes for you, Ms. Griffin, if you were going to ask anything." Umbridge smiled widely at us and I had a random shake of chills.

"Er- no, I wasn't."

"Good! Good! You will _both_ come here at five o'clock tomorrow, and the next day, and the days after that. You will both do your detentions as planned. I think it's a rather good thing you're missing out on something you were looking forward to—"

I dozed off after that. It was a message for Harry, after all. And I didn't want to listen to it.

"Now, the two of you will be doing some lines for me. You two will be using a rather special quill of mine, so don't bother getting your own." Umbridge handed the two of them a thing black quill. It was very different than any quill I had seen before.

I took one of the pieces of parchment Umbridge was also handing us.

"Mr. Potter, I want you to write _I must not tell lies._ Ms. Griffin, I want you to write _I will not associate with Half-Breeds."_

That's disgusting. I almost scoffed, but I held it back.

I spread my lips into the most forced smile I might've ever have done in my life, and I've faked smiled plenty of times. "How many times?"

"However long it takes for the message to _sink in."_

"You haven't given us any ink," Harry said. I hadn't noticed until he said that.

"You two won't be needing any," Umbridge said with a bit of laughter hiding behind her words.

I began to write _I will not associate with Half-Breeds_ on the paper. That's when I felt a screaming cut of pain in the top of my hand. I flip my hand over, only to reveal that the words I was writing were cutting right into my skin.

 _Oh my Merlin, oh my Merlin- Oh crap, oh my god._ I kept repeating that strand of words in my head as the words in my hand disappeared.

I felt like I would have an anxiety attack, my breathing starting to become uneasy. I glanced over at Harry, who was definitely feeling the pain too, except he was the only one who dared to look at Umbridge.

"Yes?"

"Nothing."

I continued writing my sentences, feeling the pain in my hand gradually get worse as they kept cutting in healing. I had been able to calm my breathing down, but I couldn't stop the feeling of tears forming in my eyes, so I turned my head away from both Harry and Umbridge. I didn't want to give Umbridge the satisfaction.

I felt horrible writing the sentence over and over, and my hand began to ache, from the pain but also from writing for so long.

I noticed that the sky outside of Umbridge's window was dark, but I didn't dare ask for the time.. I was just hoping this wasn't going to last all night.

I also felt incredibly bad for Harry. He's having to go through the same pain I am, if not worse- he's going through pain for something that _did_ happen to him.. I'm going through pain for standing up for a teacher who probably doesn't remember me.

"Come here," Umbridge said to the both of us after what felt like hours.

I look down at my hand to see how it looked. The words were gone, but my hand was burning red. It felt how it looked.

"Hands," Professor Umbridge commands and Harry and I both hand her our hands.

"Tut tut, I don't seem to have made the impression on either of you yet. We'll try again tomorrow," she said while smiling.

I had forgotten that I'm going to be feeling the pain I had just felt _again._

Harry and I both left Umbridge's office, not speaking a word to each other. Harry retreated off to the Gryffindor common room and I walked up to Hera, who had kept her promise in waiting.

I really hoped my eyes weren't as red as my hand.

"Hey!" Hera beamed at me. "How'd it go?"

"Fine," I lied quietly, "What time is it?"

"Almost ten. What did she make you guys do?"

"Oh you know, clean. The usual stuff."

Hera nodded. "Do you want to go to the library before it closes?"

I shake my head quickly. "I'm really tired from all of that. Maybe tomorrow when we have our free period."

Hera nods. "It's okay. See you tomorrow," She said softly before walking off.

If she had noticed my eyes or even my hand, she didn't say anything and I was glad she didn't. As I was speed walking back to the Hufflepuff common room, I see a very unusual sight.

The sight was of Laddie talking to Filch- and _Filch was smiling?_ I had just experienced five hours of a quill that used my skin as ink- but that was the weirdest thing I have seen all night.

I make it back to the Hufflepuff common room in peace. I tapped the rhymed on the barrels and walked inside. The common room was more crowded than I was hoping.

Luke and Reggie approached me quickly, and I wanted nothing more than to just go to my dorm room and cry.

"Hey, Stella!" Reggie said excitedly. "We wanted to know if-"

"Ask me in the morning," I cut them off with a yawn. I covered my mouth so they didn't have to watch my ugly yawning. "Had detention."

"No worries," Luke shrugged. "Goodnight."

"Night," I wave at them and hurry up to my room.

Lucky for me, all my dorm mates are asleep. I change into pajamas and close the curtains to my bed. I cast a silencing charm on it so no one could hear me as I cried myself to sleep.

**•**

**fu·ry**

**\ ˈfyu̇r-ē \**

**" intense, disordered, and often destructive rage "**

**•**

_**September 21, 1995** _   
_**Thursday** _

**•**

_**h.s.** _

Muggle Studies was on Thursday this week due to the Covington brothers needing every other Friday off for..."activities". I was surprised no one asked questions considering how long they had been here but I guess it wasn't in their best interests to know.

This was definitely one of my least favorite classes because, unlike Caleb, Malachi gave me serious off vibes. Malachi was a decade older than Caleb, on the same day, and was just as handsome but in a more sinister way.

While Caleb had a high emotional quotient, Malachi acted like everyone around him was an enemy. He was sneaky, snarky, and scary. I couldn't maintain eye contact with him which was rare considering I could keep eye contact with _Snape_.

I had this class with the Hufflepuffs again which meant Luke was going to try and sit with me again. It was the first class with the Hufflepuffs this week so I knew that it was going to be buzzing.

To be honest, I wasn't annoyed with Luke as much as last week. After we talked about our ambitions, I found it easier to relate to him in a way.

I figured that it would be easier to make friends with him instead of keeping my distance. At least then he'd burn out of me eventually.

I entered the classroom and was instantly hit with the scene of Alex chasing Luke who was chasing Reggie around the room.

Was it even worth it to say anything? To ask?

I decided it wasn't as I sat at the same desk Luke and I sat at last week, pulling a book out of my bag and reading for a few minutes.

"Whatcha doin', _belle_?"

I flick my eyes up from the pages of my book, seeing Luke a few inches from my face. I nearly fell off the stool as I leaned back in shock.

"Can you _not_ stand so close?" I grumbled, aggressively flipping to the next page.

He comes around to my side of the desk, putting his chin on my shoulder so he could read and I sighed in aggravation.

"Can I help you?"

"What book is this?" He titled his head so it would lay on the side of mine and I shoved him off, feeling my neck grow red but not from anger.

This was something different.

"The Awakening by L.J. Smith. Can you leave me alone now?" I went back to the pages as he sat in the stool next to me.

"Is it good?"

I look over at him, his puppy dog eyes making an appearance as he yearned for me to talk to him.

I groaned then shifted in my seat to look at him, putting the bookmark in between the pages before closing it and setting it down on the desk.

I slid it to Luke,"You can borrow it if you want, I've read it like five times."

He picked it up gingerly as if he would break it just by barely even touching it,"Why read it so many times?"

I shrugged,"The sequel bored me so I just reread the first one. I also like Stefan and Elena's relationship more than Damon and Elena's so.."

"Ooo, so it's a romance?" Luke wiggled an eyebrow at me and I rolled my eyes.

" _Paranormal_ romance, actually."

"Huh, kinda sounds like any romance at Hogwarts," he flipped to the back, reading the synopsis.

His eyes widened as he did and I noticed how adorable it was to see him so focused.

I snapped my eyes away when that feeling came back.

Why did I find it _adorable_ he was reading to begin with? I saw people read all the time in the hallways and the Ravenclaw common room.

It was nothing. At least, to me. But did my self conscious think something different?

"This looks pretty good but tame compared to the other stuff I've read," he grinned.

"Oh? And what "other stuff" have you read?"

"Stephen King is my favorite but I also like Thomas Harris and George R.R. Martin."

My eyes widened to saucers, their novels were some pretty hefty stuff. Child's play compared to vampire romance in high school.

"But, I think I'll give it a try," he gave me a sly look,"I could get some relationship advice from this."

He winked. I flushed.

The feeling overwhelmed me again.

"Good morning, class," we all whipped around to see Malachi Covington in all his gross feeling glory enter the classroom,"Today we shall go over the fourteenth and fifteenth centuries and I will collect the homework I asked you to complete last week on the twelfth and thirteenth centuries."

We all took our parchments out and started handing them to him as he passed down the aisles.

He finally reached Luke and I's desk, reaching his arm out to collect our parchments full of words that took hours to complete.

That's when I noticed a tattoo on his right forearm. An image I had seen before but couldn't quite put my finger on it where.

A skull with a snake wrapped around it in a figure eight.

•

Later that day, the boys decided they'd walk with me towards the Prefect common room where I promised I'd meet Stella after both our classes were done.

"Did you guys notice Malachi's tattoo?" I thought aloud, still not sure where I'd seen it before.

"Yeah, it was super cool looking!" Luke clutched my book in the crook of his arm, confirming that he was borrowing it. I worried a bit about what condition it would be returned to me in,"I think I might get something similar when I turn eighteen."

"I've never noticed a tattoo," Alex sounded confused,"What did it look like?"

"A skull with a snake around it," Luke opened the book and began skimming through pages,"Kinda like in the shape of an eight."

Alex suddenly blanched, a bead of sweat dropped down his temple," _What_?"

"Yeah, it reminded me of something but I don't remember.." I bit my bottom lip, deep in thought.

Alex and Reggie exchanged worried looks, almost looking terrified as they talked with their eyes and body language instead of words.

The memory suddenly lit up in my brain, I snapped my fingers,"I remember where I've seen it."

"Uh huh?" Alex looked like he wanted to vomit, his face pale with a green tint like he was holding back being sick.

"Are you okay?" I touched his shoulder, he nodded.

"Uh, yeah. Where have you seen it?" He didn't sound okay but I guess he didn't want to talk about it.

I'm suddenly thrown back to my childhood where I thought of my father.

Aidoneus Sincaid was an interesting man in that he was very outgoing and extroverted but was really cold to people he was closest to. I was surprised my mother even stayed with him as long as she has.

He had a home job for magical research while my mother worked for The Ministry of Magic in the dark object containment department.

Until I went to Hogwarts, all I knew was my mother being near to nonexistent while my father was as well, just in a different way.

One day, the summer after I came home from my first year at Hogwarts, I was packing for Uncle Newt's house when I went to ask Father if he knew where my cauldron went.

He was in his office. I didn't disturb him since I knew that was his private space. He hated when anyone came into his office, especially Mother.

I didn't enter just yet, I noticed he had his wand in his left hand, aiming it at his bare right forearm where he had rolled his sleeve up.

" _Apparere_ ," he hissed deeply, as if he didn't want anybody to hear.

I knew exactly why when the pale flesh distorted and seemed to move underneath the epidermis to form a black tattoo.

A skull with a snake wrapped around it in a figure eight.

My foot had creaked underneath the wooden panels beneath me and he whipped his head up, I zipped behind the doorframe before I hear a quiet," _Frustrationes deflectere."_

I never told anyone. It always scared me to think about the pained look on my father's face and the way he seemed ashamed at what appeared after the disillusionment spell wore off.

I never asked him what it was either. It didn't seem important. Now..I wondered with the way Alex and Reggie acted.

"Uh..my dad has one."

As soon as the words left my mouth, Alex and Reggie both gasped and stopped, exchanging more looks between them. It caused Luke and I to stop in our tracks, blinking in confusion.

"What is it?" Luke sounded worried now, like it wasn't normal for them to be acting like this. Like they weren't filling him in on something.

"Hera," Reggie walked a few steps closer to me,"you know about The First Wizarding War, right?"

Alex looked like he was about to cry, his bottom lip quivering and his shoulders shaking. Luke enveloped Alex in a hug to attempt to make him feel better but it didn't seem to help as he continued to shake.

"Who doesn't?"

"Do you know what..." Reggie looked around like we were being watched,"You-Know-Who's followers were called?"

I furrowed my eyebrows,"Uh, not really."

Now that I thought about it, I never really heard much about Voldemort's side of the war. I had asked questions when I was younger but my dad never said anything. He always brushed the conversation off and went back to work.

"They were called Death Eaters," he whispered it, leaning a bit closer,"Alex's parents were some of the most ruthless Death Eaters back in the day."

I felt my mouth gape open as Luke talked to Alex in a hushed tone, continuing to try and calm him down,"Okay..what does that have to do with the tattoo?"

"Death Eaters have that specific tattoo to associate them with it, it's like their club stamp."

I nodded like I understood,"So...?"

"Was your dad a Death Eater?"

The question nearly knocked me off my feet, it almost sounded ridiculous. My dad? Working for the Dark Lord?

It couldn't be. I didn't want it to be.

But it was possible.

"I...I don't know."

•

It took a few minutes to get Alex to calm down, he was really shaken about the whole conversation.

Luke and I didn't ask questions, we knew he wasn't ready. He'd tell us when he wanted to. Or maybe Angelica would tell me eventually.

I guess I'd have to wait until then.

As we entered the Prefect common room, I noticed Stella in the back corner in a lounge chair, reading a book I recommended her a couple months ago.

I waved to her and she smiled wryly as she waved back shyly, but I noticed something as we approached that made my eyebrows furrow.

She had a bandage on her left hand.

I zoomed my way to the other side of the room, standing directly in front of her as I stared at her hand intently.

She seemed to squirm in her seat when she noticed I was looking,"What's up?"

"What is _that_?" I didn't have to point for her to know what I was talking about.

"What do you mean?"

I scoffed in disbelief,"Stella," she looked up at me like it was nothing,"What happened?"

She shrugged,"Nothing."

"I know damn well you didn't do anything to yourself. What happened?"

She swallowed nervously before she looked around to make sure no one was watching, she unwrapped her hand and held it out so I could take it.

I took it and brought it up to my face. My heart dropped when I saw words etched into her skin.

_I will not associate with Half-Breeds_

I felt my breath hitch in my throat as anger began to boil through my blood, the heat enveloping my body was indescribable.

All three boys gasped behind me and I couldn't even say anything as I began to grind my teeth. My jaw began to quiver and my breathing was jagged.

" _Who did this_?" I mumbled lowly, knowing I would scream if I was any louder.

"Hera-"

"Who did this?" I said slightly louder but calmly, keeping my cool even though I wanted to set fire to this entire castle.

"Hera, maybe you should just.." Reggie placed a hand on my shoulder, trying to calm me down but I wasn't going down easily.

"Get off me," I growled at him.

He whipped his hand off me and I stared at Stella,"Who."

She sighed deeply, looking helpless before she licked her lips and said,"Professor Umbridge."

I couldn't even think as I turned around and charged out the doors, hearing the boys and Stella running after me as I zipped through the hallways.

I eventually caught a slight tinge of pink in my peripheral vision.

Blinded by my fury, I took my wand out, marching down the hallway. I held my wand up,"Hey, Umbridge!"

She turned around, an offended look streaked across her face when she heard the name but looked calm when she saw it was me,"Yes, dear?"

I took in a deep breath as a hex, or possibly an unforgivable curse, was about to spill off my tongue, when I felt arms suddenly holding me back, nearly knocking me off my feet.

"Hera, stop!" I heard Alex say on my right, holding my right arm.

"Yeah, this isn't right," Reggie chimed in on my left, clutching my left arm for dear life.

I resisted against their grip until I felt someone rest their head on my right shoulder and heard their voice whisper,"Hera, calm down. Please."

I suddenly felt my breath expel from me, realizing who it was.

 _Luke_. And he was holding my _waist_.

I went limp in their hold and almost made all of us fall on the ground but they held their stance.

"I..." I felt my body turn red,"Uh, I think I'm okay."

"Are you sure?" Alex asked, not sounding very convinced. Even the other boys didn't loosen their hold as I nodded.

"Guys, I'm...fine." But was I though?

Why did I get so weak when I heard Luke? It didn't make sense.

Or did it?

They all let go of me but not before exchanging looks, stepping only a few inches a way in case I would go off on another rampage.

I stared at the ground in defeat, ashamed in the anger I felt. Wondering why I even felt that way to begin with.

Then I looked up and I saw Stella with her white bandage around her hand and it came back.

 _Umbridge_.

"Was there anything you wanted to say to me, dear?" Her voice was sweet behind me but I heard it like a cat's nails on a chalkboard or like teeth bitting onto a fork.

I felt it again. The lividity. The fury. The red-hot anger that I knew wasn't going away unless I didn't something.

I noticed a crowd forming. Knowing that there being an audience was only influencing me worse. But I didn't care, this feeling was great. Almost seductive.

I titled my head up, a dark smirk forming on my lips that no one caught until it was too late,"Actually..."

I turned around, a manic grin sprawled across my face,"Yes, Professor, there was."

My tone of voice was enough for the trio to lunge at me but it was too late. My lips parted and I said it before I could control my thoughts.

" _Expelliarmus! Flipendo_!" I said the spells quickly, not even breathing as her wand went flying out of her hand and she flew across the room.

Umbridge crashed into the wall at the end of the hallway, people gasping and some cheering. I was a hit.

I ran to the opposite side of the hallway, waiting until Umbridge stood up before I yelled out," _Petrificus totalus_!"

She froze in her spot, falling backward and laying on the ground. She whined and everyone laughed.

I turned around and bowed, feeling euphoric.

But then I noticed Stella, Alex, Luke, and Reggie's expressions. They were terrified.

They were mortified. They were _scared_.

Unfortunately, however, one of the ass-kissing students unfroze Umbridge and she sprung up, as angry and livid as I was just seconds ago.

"Miss Sincaid! I hereby expel you from your position as Head Girl!"


	6. v. - puppy love

**de·sire**  
 **\ di-ˈzī(-ə)r \**  
 **" to wish or long for; crave; want "**  
 **•**  
 ** _October 7, 1995_**  
 ** _Saturday_**  
•  
 ** _h.s_**

It had been a little over two weeks since I was essentially fired from my position as Head Girl. But, to be honest, besides Umbridge confiscating my badge..nothing felt different.

All the students still acted like I was their senior and some even respected me more since I stood up to that hag. I wondered if it was even worth it for her to take my title away at all.

The best part about it was that I hated that title so I was, guiltily, kind of glad she took it away. I found I wasn't expected to watch over students anymore and I didn't have to play "mommy" to most of them.

I ended up getting punished by Flitwick for assaulting a professor, four weeks cleaning out some old closets in the Ravenclaw tower and a official academic warning that I'd be expelled if I did it again. But, I couldn't help but notice a funny little smirk on his face when I explained to him what happened.

Rumors around the Ravenclaws suggested he was being forced to give out a punishment as it seemed that he was actually happier since the incident.

Eventually, one of the first years told me that Flitwick mentioned how I was one of his best students and it was nice to see me using the spells he taught..even for a worser purpose than intended.

Ever since that day, I didn't feel that type of anger. I still have no idea why I was so blinded, so infuriated that I attacked a _professor_.

It was unlike me. It was unlike anything I ever stood for.

But then I thought about my dad and the evidence pointing him to be a Death Eater, remembering times he would get angry over the dumbest things possible like accusations of a mole in the Ministry or how Voldemort was back from the grave.

I wondered if I inherited that trait from him. I certainly hoped I didn't.

Today was officially the first day of Hogsmeade weekend for the school year, everyone was abuzz and the wind whipped with bitter coldness that nearly knocked me off my feet.

Fall weather was my favorite but there was something indifferent and eerie about it that made me shiver every time. Somehow, I was in love with that feeling.

We all got into our groups of years before we started walking towards Hogsmeade, we weren't allowed to talk to anyone except for those in our groups until we got there so I couldn't talk to Stella, Julie, or Flynn.

Instead, I was stuck with Sunset Curve and their roadie, Laddie. I found out he didn't like to be called their roadie so I got a kick out of it when I said it and his face would turn red in anger.

I loved messing with him. I knew it was wrong and I knew it annoyed Alex but...it was the only source of joy I got from his presence. Other than that, Laddie pissed me off to no end.

Luke stuck by my side the entire time there, rambling about random stuff that I was in awe to how he could keep track of all the conversations at once. Somehow, Reggie and Alex weren't lost in any of it and I wished I could learn from them.

Luke was complicated but in a good way. I guess you had to know how to deal with him in order to get him.

I found out that I enjoyed being his friend about a week ago, he was sweet when he wanted to be and I was all for it.

But, sometimes, there was a certain feeling that passed over me when he talked about his passions with that little tinge of a laugh in his voice or when he stumbled over his feet and giggled at his clumsiness or how he would stare and his eyes would shine at something he was interested in.

It was an odd feeling that I hadn't felt for anyone since....

Well, let's just say it had been awhile.

On our way to Hogsmeade, I found myself noticing how he rubbed his palms together to warm himself up and how eager he was when he dared Alex to race him down the hill.

Alex said no but Luke said something about getting his fun soon enough and everyone exchanged alarmed expressions before Luke pointed to a tree and rushed to it with no explanation.

Reggie gravitated his way toward me and he shoves his shoulder into mine playfully,"So..Luke, huh?"

"What?" I blinked.

"Luke. You like him," Reggie crossed his arms,"I thought that was obvious."

"Uh, no, you're wrong," my heart skipped, telling me I was lying. But I didn't give in.

"Says the girl who just stared at him like he was your moon and stars," Reggie kicked a pebble across the path,"He stares at you the same way."

I felt my face grow hot but I just told myself it was from the sudden cold gush of wind that whooshed past us,"I don't know what you're talking about."

"Okay," Reggie scoffed,"But I'm going to go ahead and say most people don't look at or talk to people the way you do with him unless they have interior feelings."

I continued to blink,"I just talk to him normally."

"No, you're mean to him. Or _meaner_ than to Alex and I."

"That would mean I like Laddie at this point," I made a sour face, glancing behind me at Alex and Laddie smiling at each other.

Reggie let out a guffaw,"I mean, I guess that's true but...I don't know if you've seen the way Luke looks at you but he talks about you a lot."

" _Me_? Why would he-?"

" _Hera_!" Luke was sprinting from the tree he had been inspecting a minute ago, he made me stop in my tracks as I furrowed my eyebrows.

"Hand," he held out his palm and I stared at him like he was dumb,"C'mon, we don't have all day."

"Uh..okay..." I placed my hand palm up on his.

He smiled goofily and giggled before he dropped something my palm, he pulled his hand away to reveal a single acorn in the middle of my palm.

"Uh."

He laughed,"It's an acorn."

"I see that."

"Do you like it?"

I looked him up and down to make sure he was feeling alright,"Uh..it's an acorn."

"Yeah, I thought you'd like it," he sounded like he was serious but I couldn't tell half the time with him.

I didn't know what else to do so I smiled genuinely and nodded,"Love it," but then I glanced at Reggie and said,"Why didn't you get Reggie one too?"

Luke wrinkled his nose,"Why would I?"

"Because he's your friend?"

"Eh, I'd prefer to give you stuff anyway. You're nicer," he threw a pebble and it skipped across the path.

I felt my eyes widen and I looked at Reggie, his lips were pursed and he raised his eyebrows in a "told-you-so" kinda way.

For the rest of the way there, Luke stepped closer to me every once in awhile and the aura of his form next to me made me feel a yearning.

I didn't know what type of yearning until his hand brushed mine in the slightest bit, making me nearly jerk back like an electrical shock went through me but I stayed cool.

If only my cheeks hadn't turned bright red and Reggie didn't have a crap eating grin on his face in my peripheral vision.

•

"What do you think of me being Elena for the party?" I sifted through the multitudes of racks of clothes while looking for a brown leather jacket, asking Stella like I hadn't already made up my mind.

"Is Elena from that vampire book?" She was looking at the dresses, showing various faces from the varying types of fabrics and designs.

"Yeah, the one with Stefan and Damon." I groaned,"Why do wizards not wear leather jackets? I can't find any."

"Try finding a dress for a musical," she pulled out an ugly lavender, grandma looking frock,"Would Christine Daaé wear this?"

I let out a laugh and she grinned before putting it back.

Stella and I suddenly whipped our heads to the front of the store when I heard yelling, seeing a few Hogwarts students chasing each other and I blinked.

"What is going on?" I started walking towards the exit.

"You're not Head Girl anymore so you don't have to worry about it," Stella grimaced at a pale pink silk nightgown.

My face suddenly blanched when I realized who it was making all the commotion,"Stella.."

"Hmm?" She looked up and then her face went blank,"Oh my God."

It was Luke, Alex, and Reggie.

I rushed outside and stared at them going in circles before Luke flicked his head up and grinned, running to me before yelling,"Let's go!"

He grabbed my hand like his life depended on it and nearly gave me whiplash as he ran down the street.

" _What are you_ -?!"

"Shhhh!"

We turned a corner before eventually he ran in a nook in between Zonko's Joke Shop and Honeyduke's, a tight squeeze that nearly made us touch chests. The thought made me swallow nervously.

We faced each other as he panted, craning his neck around the corner to look for Alex and Reggie,"I think we lost them."

"What _happened_?"

He suddenly put a finger up to his lips, a bead of sweat dripped from his temple and my breath caught in my throat. I stared at him while his chest heaved, my heart jumping multiple times and my breath uneasy.

Suddenly, Alex and Reggie ran by, I noticed Alex's hair was pitch black and he looked around frantically while Reggie yelled at him to calm down. I wondered if Luke had anything to do with that.

They ran past and Luke sighed deeply,"Okay, they're gone."

"Uh, I-I think I'm gonna, um, go.." I started to move out of the alcove but Luke's eyes widened like a puppy's.

"But what if they see you? Then they'll know where I am."

"You'll see them back at Hogwarts anyway so it doesn't really matter," I noticed my hands shaking as I tried my hardest not to touch him.

He then let out a deep chuckle and I tried my hardest not to let my eyes widen but I lost. My eyes widened and I felt heat rise up to my cheeks.

"What?" I swallowed.

"You," he crossed his arms,"really don't want to be here right now, huh?"

"I was looking for Halloween party costumes with Stella so..you disturbed me," I grunted as I continued to try and squeeze past him but I knew I couldn't unless I would touch him.

And I knew I'd explode if I did.

"What are you going as?" He genuinely asked.

"Elena from that book I lent you."

"Oh yeah, I started reading it a couple weeks ago. I'm almost done," he gave me a cheeky smile,"I can see why you like Stefan and Elena. They're cute."

"They're definitely something," I sighed in defeat, knowing I'd be here for awhile if Luke didn't want to leave just yet.

We sat in silence for a few minutes before Luke licked his lips and I took a sudden intake of breath, looking away quickly before he could see my face.

He chuckled again,"You're funny."

"How so?" I acted dumb.

"I could do anything right now and you'd get redder, huh?" I turned redder just from the statement and he grinned,"My point exactly."

"Shut up," I picked at my fingernails,"You don't know what I'm feeling right now."

"Oh? I don't?" He looked down at his feet,"Try me."

My heart jumped so high that I thought it would come out of my throat and I said it before I could even comprehend what I was thinking,"Don't you know how much I want to?"

His face suddenly turned from joking to serious, his eyes turning from wide to shining. He liked that I said that. I didn't, I was dying from the inside from the confession.

"You mean that?" He inched closer and I started panicking, my head slamming against the brick wall behind me so I could back up from embarrassment.

"I, uh.." I blinked a few times, watching him slide down to my height,"I...."

He stared into my eyes, emotions pouring out of them like a waterfall to a river. I knew in that moment that he liked me.

He liked me.

He liked _me_.

I thought about saying "yes". A simple answer. Enough for him to know. A simple answer for a simple question. But was it really that simple?

Did I like him?

Yes.

But what would happen if I gave in to the desire? I wasn't usually easily influenced by things that didn't mean much to me. But what about temptation for something I truly craved?

He's what I wanted. But what would happen if he lost interest eventually? What about the consequences if things didn't go well?

And, for once in my entire life, I didn't think of the consequences. I thought about what I wanted in that moment. What I would give anything in the world for in that split second.

"Yes."

His eyes turned soft, he didn't say anything, he just leaned forward.

And my world, my rules, my policies of everything I wanted and begged for collapsed and crumbled around me as his lips pressed onto mine softly.

Soon enough, his chest touched mine, his hands on either side of my face as I put my hands in his hair and pulled him closer.

Everything was on fire around us except for us, we were indestructible. Fire-proof. The end of an era. Blacking out for the first time in my life.

I wanted nothing more to be in that moment for the rest of my life, to have nothing but an endless loop of the first contact with him playing on repeat until the end of time.

And when he finally pulled away, I realized what happened. It internalized.

My heart dropped glancing between his eyes and his lips, soft and irresistible.

I wanted to kiss him again. I wanted to be his. I wanted him to be mine.

But then I realized something.

My desire was speaking for me. And I wasn't sure if I was being weak or if I was finally taking control of my life.

The next thing I know, I'm making my way towards Hogshead without a word, leaving a dumbstruck Luke in the alcove between Zonko's and Honeyduke's with a bit of tint on his cheeks.

 **both·er/**  
 **ˈbäT͟Hər/**  
 **"trouble or annoy (someone) by interrupting or causing inconvenience."**  
 **•**  
 ** _October 7, 1995_**  
 ** _Saturday_**  
•  
 ** _s.g._**

It took me ages to find a gown after Hera left, but I eventually found the perfect one. I approached the cashier and carefully laid the white gown on the desk.

"Three galleons," The wizard working at the desk said grimly.

"Erm-" I dug through my pockets for my money but only could find knuts. I sighed out of frustration. "Sorry, I don't have that."

The wizard rolled his eyes. "Then you won't be getting this."

I picked up the gown sadly to go put it back where it belonged when a voice came up from behind me.

"Yes, she will," I turn my head and see Carrie. Of course, it's Carrie. She always knows, and it's very disturbing to me.

"You don't have to pay for it-" I began to protest but she waved me off. "Nonsense. How much is it?"

"Three galleons," The cashier repeated, looking very annoyed with the both of us.

Carrie pulled three galleons from her pocket and handed them to the wizard. The wizard finally seemed satisfied and we began started to exit the store.

"Why did you need the gown, anyway?" Carrie spoke up midway through our walk out of the store.

"For the Prefect Halloween party."

"Oh I'm going to that," She stated and I raised an eyebrow. "I know some people," She added when she saw my confused look.

"Who are you being?" I ask out of curiosity. Not that I'm wondering, it's not as if she's going to be the Phantom to my Christine.

"A cat," Carrie grinned and my heart fluttered and sank at the same time. Her being a cat made me think about the times we would dress up as cats and try to sneak into the Prefect's party every year.

Who knew I wouldn't be friends with her by the time we actually could go?

"What about you? Who's the gown for?"

"Christine from Phantom of the Opera," I glanced over at Carrie to see her reaction, but she looked dumbfounded. I forgot that she's a Pureblood and wouldn't know what that is.

"What's Phantom of the opera?"

"It's uh, a muggle musical, about a Phantom at an Opera," I lazily explain.

"Ah," Carrie breathed as we exited the shop.

"How did you know I was in there?" I asked Carrie randomly when I opened the door to the shop, holding it open for her so she could leave.

"I didn't," Carrie shrugs. "There looked like a murder was about to happen outside" I guess that was her metaphor for whatever commotion Hera left me to go see. "You just happened to be in there."

We walked in silence again. "You really didn't have to pay for me," I announced.

"Yeah, I really didn't, but I wanted to."

"Why would you want to?" I said accidentally, it was supposed to be a thought.

Carrie turned towards me and gave me a piercing look as if a cat had just spotted a mouse. That scared me a little bit. "Isn't it obvious? I'm trying to rekindle our friendship. I have been for the last month."

Oh.

"Look, Carrie.." I began, choosing my choice of words carefully. "The way our friendship ended hurt me, _a lot,_ and I'm not ready to forgive you for it yet."

_If I let you back in, my feelings will get in the way again. And you'll leave again._

"I _know_ I hurt you," Carrie stated. "And I'm sorry. I shouldn't have left, especially since I know how you feel when people leave."

"But _why?_ Why did you leave?"

"Because I was _scared_!" Carrie emphasizes and I scoffed.

"You were scared?!" I lowered my voice as I didn't want people overhearing what I was about to say next. "How do you think I felt confessing my _romantic_ feelings to a _girl_ who then left?!"

Carrie looked flabbergasted, and at a loss of words.

I feel like I'm about to have the second anxiety attack of the year. I hate confrontation, but it hurts every time Carrie approaches me. She needs to understand that I _can't_ yet.

Then, I spot Laddie. Never thought I would be happy to see that boy.

"Look," I continue, my tone a little bit softer. "I'm not ready nor do I want to have this conversation out in the open. I'll come to you when I'm ready to talk about it."

All Carrie did was nod and I walked past her, making my way up to Laddie.

"Hey, Laddie!" I say enthusiastically to hide the upsetness that was probably painfully obvious on my face.

"Hey.." Laddie looked at me in surprise. He probably didn't expect to see me talking to him.

I'm just as surprised as he is, but whatever. I needed to get out of that conversation and I've been meaning to talk to him about that scene I saw at the end of my detention...

"You okay? You and Carrie seemed to look like you guys were getting into it.." The expression on his face transitioned from surprised to concern.

"Oh yeah, I'm good," I lie, but I know I'll feel fine later when I find Hera. "Yeah, we just have some unresolved.." I shook my head as I didn't want to spill my guts to _Laddie._ "Nothing. _I_ actually wanted to talk to you about something."

"Oh really?" Laddie smirked.

"Yes. About a week or so ago, I was going back to my common room, and I'm _pretty sure_ I saw you talking to Filch who was _smiling_ at-"

Laddie started to laugh which made me laugh too.

"I just mean- Filch doesn't _smile._ How did that happen?"

"He's uh, a family friend," Laddie says awkwardly.

"That's very ominous. I didn't know Filch had _friends._ "

"Yeah he doesn't seem like the type, does he?"

"No, not really," The conversation ends there and I look down at my feet, moving dirt around with my foot. "Are you going to Hogshead?"

Laddie nodded. "I was going with Alex but he is... not here."

As if on cue, I see a very angry Alex storming up behind Laddie, and a Reggie who was giving us a look filled with pity.

"He's actually- oh my merlin _his hair!"_ I gasp and Laddie turns around.

"What the bloody hell happened to you?" Laddie asked when Alex- who now has black hair approached.

"Luke," Alex stated flatly.

_So that's where Hera went._

Laddie smirked again. "Ah, had his way with you, did he?"

Alex glared at him. "Shut up, Laddie."

"Alex, our hair is almost the same color!" I say. Why did I say that? Who knows.

"You don't happen to know how to turn it back, do you?" He asked me, hope filled in his eyes.

"If you don't know then I don't know."

Alex groaned and Laddie patted his shoulder.

"Alex," Reggie approached with caution. "Why don't we go to the Hogshead now? He might be there."

"Yeah," Laddie agreed. "Stella and I were just about to head that way."

Alex nodded reluctantly and we all headed there. Out of the three years I've been coming to Hogsmeade, this is one of the few places I haven't been to yet. It wasn't unintentional, per say, but most people avoid this place, which is why it confused me when Hermione Granger approached me a few days ago about meeting her and a few other people here.

Needless to say, I found out a ton of us had been asked. Maybe they want to start a secret organization. That would be funny.

I notice when we walk in there's a good amount of people. I recognize most of the Hufflepuffs here along with a few other students. Harry, Ron, and Hermione were all standing towards the front of the pub. I also saw how there weren't many Slytherins— none that I knew anyway. Except for Flynn, who was sitting with Julie and Angelica.

I hear the bell ring from the door and I turn around to see who it is out of curiosity.

I recognize by her flaming red hair immediately that it's Hera, whose face is almost as red as her hair.

I gave her a look that said ' _Where did you go_ ' but my look changed to a teasing grin when I saw Luke walk in behind her. It all made sense in my head. They both disappeared and then Hera came in here looking as red as a tomato.

"What?" Hera questions when she spotted me.

I just continue to grin at her.

" _What?"_ She repeated and I tilted my head towards Luke.

"Finally," was all I said before Hera's face turned even more red, which I didn't think was possible.

Hera and I sat down with the girls and I watched as Alex began to lunge himself at Luke, but Reggie held him back.

My attention then turned to Hermione when she spoke up.

"Er—" She spoke rather loudly over all the noise. "Well—er—hi."

I could tell she was nervous so I gave her a reassuring smile, hoping that would help. She smiled a little in return and began to speak again.

"Well.. uh.. you know why you're here. Um.. Harry here," She gestures to Harry who's standing beside her. "Had an idea—" Harry gave her a look. It's the same look that Hera and I give each other sometimes. "I mean— _I_ had the idea that it might be good if people wanted to study _actual_ Defense Against the Dark Arts, not that rubbish that Umbridge is doing with us."

"Hear, hear," said Ravenclaw Prefect Anthony Goldstein.

"Well," Hermione continued. "Well, I thought it would be good if we took matters into our own hands.... And by that, I mean learning how to defend ourselves properly, with proper spells—"

"You want to pass your Defense Against the Dark Arts O.W.L. too though, I bet?" A random boy asked.

O.W.L.S... dark times. The amount of stress those caused me last year was insane, and I'm sure the N.E.W.T.S next year will be even worse.

"Of course I do!" Hermione snapped. "But I want to be properly trained in Defense because... because..." She took a deep breath. "Because Lord Voldemort is back."

The whole room started to mummer, and I could see a strike of annoyance across Harry's face.

"Well.. that's the plan anyway," Hermione continued again. "If you want to join us, we need to decide how we're going to-"

"Where's the proof You-Know-Who is back?" said Zacharias Smith in a rather aggressive voice. He's a chaser on the Quidditch team.

"Well, Dumbledore believes it-" Hermione explained.

"You mean Dumbledore believes _him_ ," the boy nodded at Harry.

Leave Harry alone, will you?

"Who are _you_?" Ron asked rather rudely.

"Zacharias Smith, and I think we've got the right to know what makes _him_ say You-Know-Who's—"

"Zacharias," Alex warned, which made him shut up.

"It's okay," Harry spoke up. "I saw him. I know what I saw. But Dumbledore _did_ tell the whole school last year, and if you don't believe him then you don't believe me. And I'm not spending my afternoon trying to convince all of you."

Zacharias began to speak again. "Dumbledore told us that Cedric Diggory got killed by You-Know-Who and that you brought Diggory's body back to Hogwarts. He didn't tell us how he was killed, but I think we would all like-"

"Why do you want to know what it looks like when You-Know-Who kills someone?" Angelica spat at him.

"She's right, and I can't help you," Harry said in a tone like he was about to scream.

I don't blame him, I'm _this_ close to threatening to take away house points.

"Look, I'm not going to talk about Cedric so if that's why you all are here then you might as well clear out."

No one moved, not even Zacharias.

"Anyway..." Hermione started hesitantly. "As I was saying.. if you want to learn some defense, then we need to work out how we're going to do it, how often we're going to meet, and where we're going to-"

"Is it true?" Susan Bones, a fifth-year that I know interrupted. "That you can produce a Patronus? A stag Patronus?"

There was more murmuring, this time, the group seemed more interested.

"Yeah, How'd you know that?" Harry answered.

"My auntie is Madam Bones," Susan shrugged.

For the next few minutes, the group was talking about all the stuff Harry had done. A Patronus, killed the basilisk, saved the philosopher's stone.. The list was endless. I would be lying if I said I didn't look up to Harry a little bit, even if he's a year younger. We relate in a few ways too, especially with the whole parent thing.

"Are you trying to weasel out of showing us any of this stuff?" Zacharias said after all the praise.

That's when I finally said something. "Zacharias, don't think I won't take house points anyway from our own house, because I will."

That made him flush and sink down in his seat.

Hermione took a deep breath. "Moving on... We want to all take lessons from Harry, right?"

The room agreed and Hermione looked revealed.

"Now that that's settled, the next question is when do we want to meet? I think once a week will be enough-"

"As long as it doesn't interfere with any house's Quidditch practices!" A Gryffindor girl said. Good point.

"I'm sure we'll find a day that suits everyone.. The next thing we need to decide on is where. Anyone have any ideas..?" Hermione requested.

A few ideas were suggested, but none seemed to satisfy the trio.

"We'll find a place, I'm sure," Hermione sighed. "I— I think everybody should write their names down, just so we know who was here. But signing means agreeing not to tell Umbridge or anybody else."

Fred Weasley was first to put his name on the list. Sunset Curve all signed, along with Laddie, Julie, Flynn, and Angelica. I eagerly walked up to the table. I was sold on the idea as soon as I heard it, especially because I _hate_ Umbridge. I sign _'Estella Griffin'_ on the paper and Hera walks up after me.

I then hear some hesitation from Ernie. "We're _Prefects._ If this list is found.. I mean you said it yourself if Umbridge finds it.." He glances at Hera.

"Umbridge took away my position as Head Girl because I _attacked_ her, not because I signed a list," Hera pointed out.

"I wouldn't leave it laying around, anyway," Hermione said.

After groups of people decided to leave, Hera and I left. "So, do you want to head to the Three Broomsticks so you can tell me about what happened with Luke?"

Hera blushed. "Yeah.. Yeah," She said quietly as we headed to the Three Broomsticks. When we both got there, we spent our last few hours in Hogsmeade just talking about the events from today.

I have a really good feeling about Harry's plan, but I still feel off about this year. I just hope that feeling will go away soon..


	7. vi. - caleb & his secrets

**be·wil·der**

**/bəˈwildər/**

**"cause (someone) to become perplexed and confused."**

•

**_October 9, 1995_ **

**_Monday_ **

•

**_s.g._ **

I decided that today, I'm going to start doing some studying on apparition since I can start taking classes after Christmas. Luke had warned me that he lost his arm his first attempt before Alex had told him to leave me alone. He sure did get my anxiety worked up that I'm now in the library, reading as much as I can about apparition before my lessons begin.

I don't even like reading for school, but apparition is definitely one of those things I should study before doing. Hera advised me to, anyway. She said it would be fine and that Luke was making it a bigger deal than it was, but I remember her having just as much anxiety about it as me.

Madam Pince helps me find the book I'm looking for before I sit down at a table, one that's a little ways from all the others as I want to be left alone right now.

The book had some pretty good tips in it, but the tip I wanted to know the most about was how _not_ to get splinched. I was very surprised at how often that actually happens.

I hadn't been able to concentrate on the reading again after that as I heard laughter, laughter that wasn't stopping. I got up to go kindly ask them to quiet down (Madam Pince would be.. not so nice) but the two people causing the laughter came to me.

It was Laddie and Alex.

I sat myself right back down and they sat across from me.

"Whatcha reading?" Alex asks me and I'm suddenly hit with a huge wave of nostalgia.

"A book about apparition. I start my lessons next term."

"Oh, yeah. I overheard Luke teasing you about it. Even if you do lose an arm or-"

I glared at him.

".. Or something.. they easily bring them back."

I rubbed my eyes. "That doesn't make me feel any better."

"Yeah, sorry," Alex apologized.

"Can I see that book?" Laddie spoke up and I slid the book over to him. He looked through a few pages before tossing the book aside. Alex left to go retreat it, cursing at Laddie under his breath.

"Hey!" I snap but not too loudly.

"All of that is rubbish."

"Rubbish in what way?" I ask and Laddie leans on the table.

"You're muggle-born, right?"

I raise an eyebrow as I'm not sure how he knew that, but whatever. "I mean, I guess-"

"Do you have a license?"

"I wish. The head of the orphanage I live at never allowed any of us to. She thinks we'll run away if we have one," I explained and thought about the time where one of my friends there had tried to sneak out to drive, and the punishment she got when she got caught sent shivers down my spine.

"There goes my analogy," Laddie leaned back in his chair.

"Were you going to compare apparition to _driving_?"

"Yes. They're alike in ways."

"Uh-huh... And do you drive?"

"Yes, I do as a matter of face-" Laddie turned his attention to a group of Gryffindors walking by. He was glaring daggers at them and I had no idea why.

I turned my attention towards them too and I caught myself staring at a girl and a guy who were walking side by side. They were both very attractive.

"Not this again, Lads," Alex snapped me out of my trance once he returned with the book.

"What's the problem with them?" I looked at Alex.

"William, the guy in the middle, is Laddie's arch-nemesis," Alex cleared up.

"He is _not_ my arch nemesis!" Laddie argued.

"You try to attack him instead of the other team every time you two fill in as beaters!"

Their banter made me laugh. I admire them for being an openly gay couple at Hogwarts. I hoped that one day, in a perfect world maybe, that maybe I would be able to be open with a girl, in a place where people don't judge. I mean there are some people at Hogwarts who are very prejudiced, but most of the people here don't care.

I notice as I'm invested in my thoughts, that Alex and Laddie were staring at me with two very confused looks.

Oh shit, did I say some of that out loud?

Alex was the one to speak up. "You admire us.. _why_?"

I felt my face burn up and I looked at the ground. "Uh.. I mean.. cause like- you guys aren't trying to hide your relationship or anything and I think that's really brave," I say shyly and look back up at them. I was expecting them to have looks of annoyance on their faces but Alex was smiling and Laddie was smirking.

"Called it," was all Laddie said and a look of puzzlement spread throughout my face.

"You did not ' _call it_ '" Alex said quietly.

I scratched the top of my head. "What do you mean by 'called it?'"

"Nothing, nothing," Laddie waved his hand at me.

It then hit me that they probably figured out that I'm not straight. I quickly stood up and started collecting my things. I doubt Alex and Laddie- of _all people_ would be the ones to have a problem with it, but the only two people I've told are Hera and Carrie.. And look how that ended up.

"Well, um. Thanks for the apparition tips," I say quickly and grab the book from Alex as I had checked it out prior to this interaction. "And I'm pansexual, by the way. If that's what the two of you were calling," I added before leaving the library without another word. I didn't want to be around for their reactions. I wouldn't have told them if they didn't figure it out.

I had been adopted when I was two, and my parents made sure to enroll me in school. It was there that I learned that I look at girls and think about girls the same way I think about boys, but I had no one to tell, no one at all. Maybe I could've told my adoptive family.. But that didn't work out in the end anyway, it's better that I didn't.

I didn't even know what the term 'Pansexual' was until my parents threw me and my adopted sister back into the orphanage, but as soon as I heard the label I knew that _that_ was what I am.

And maybe I'm scared to tell people, to actually pursue a relationship with someone of the same sex, but I'm not scared or ashamed of who I am.. And I guess that's the best part and the only part that matters.

•

My final class of the day is 'Ancient Runes' that one of the Covington brothers teaches. I've never been able to look at either of them the same since Hera told me she had a crush on Caleb Covington, who just so happened to teach this class.

I didn't exactly like this class, but I didn't hate it. The only reason I'm taking it this year is that I had been putting off the rest of it for the past two. Lucky for me, Flynn had also been putting it off so I have the class with her.

I enter the classroom and sit with Flynn as I always do. Professor Covington had the same look of utter despair on his face that he always had. I can tell he hates teaching his class just as much as half of us hate learning it.

Once everyone had arrived into the classroom, Professor Covington placed his top hat on his head with a spell and began writing on the board. I picked up my quill to begin jotting it down. I wrote so quickly that my writing was almost in sync with his.

"Some of you are new to this class, while others-" Professor Covington looked over at a couple of Gryffindors before looking back at the rest of us. "Not so much. Who all here has taken this class before?"

I raised my hand along with a couple of others. Professor Covington looked around with a satisfied look. "I remember most of you. Now, I hope you all did your summer reading because you'll be having a quiz on it now."

The whole class groaned but Covington did nothing to silence them, instead, he just passed out the quiz with his wand. "If you have any questions, don't hesitate to ask," He said simply before sitting behind his desk, opening up the Daily Prophet.

I take a deep breath and write my name at the top of the quiz before beginning. The first four questions were easy.. Maybe it's because I did my summer reading very last minute, but then I got stuck at number five. Professor Covington said to ask questions if we got stuck, so I raised my hand for the second time in this class.

Professor Covington looked up from the Daily Prophet and looked annoyed with me. He probably didn't want to get up, so I don't blame his annoyance. He walked over to me and stood there with his piercing look. Now, I'm terrified.

"Yes, Ms. Black?"

_Ms. Black_? _What_? Where on earth did the last name ' _Black_ ' come from? Even before I was adopted, I don't think that was my last name. I don't think I _even had_ a last name.

"Erm, it's Griffin, not Black," I corrected him but an apologetic look didn't appear on his face like I had been expecting. Instead, he had a look of amusement.

"Sure it's not. What is your question?"

I stare at him, my mouth agape and the question I had about the quiz was long gone.

"Uh.. never mind. I figured it out," I mumble and immediately looked back at my quiz, not wanting to see Professor Covington's reaction.

I glanced over at Flynn, who seemed just as bewildered as I was.

The class after that went on for what felt like ages (which sucked because I was hungry and wanted to know why Professor Covington got my last name wrong) before finally finishing. I waited for everyone to leave the classroom before walking up to Professor Covington's desk.

"Professor Covington?" I say to get his attention and he turns around.

"Is there something you need?"

"Yes, actually. Why did you call me Ms. Black earlier? I know there's no one in the school with the last name 'Black' that you could mistake me for, so.."

Professor Covington smiled at me, but it wasn't a happy smile, it was an evil smile per se.

"I knew your parents. Well, more like I knew your dad."

"You knew my biological parents?"

"Yes, yes.." Professor Covington looked around. "Let's just say your father and I worked in the same department."

I was suddenly intrigued. I knew nothing about my biological parents, and now a professor at my school is telling me he knew my dad? I had so many questions I wanted to get answered. "What department exactly?"

Professor Covington sat down and began to grade the pile of quizzes. "Look, Ms. Griffin. I'm not going to be the one to tell you about your parents. If you want to know, go to the library and find books about Purebloods. There will be a lot about the Black family in those."

"Does this have anything to do with Sirius Black?" I blurted out. I had forgotten all about Sirius Black, the Azkaban escapee who escaped in my fourth year, but his last name is Black..

Professor Covington made no signs of an answer and just continued to grade papers.

"Well.. Thank you for your time," I tell before rushing out of the classroom.

I started to make my way towards the Great Hall for lunch, but then I saw Angelica. Angelica is a Pureblood.. maybe she'll know about the Blacks.

"Hey, Angelica!" I ran-up to her and she smiled in return. "Are you heading to lunch?"

"Yup! I just got out of Arithmancy. Have you taken that subject?"

I nod. "I hated it. I'm supposed to be taking Advanced Arithmancy Studies next year though."

"Good luck, Laddie says that's hard."

"Should I trust Laddie's judgment on that?" I ask and Angelica chuckles.

"Believe it or not, but Laddie does actually try in school."

"I need to talk to you about something, though," I look over at her out of the corner of my eye and she seems to be listening.

"What do you know about the Black family?"

Angelica went pale.

"Why?" Angelica interrogated.

"Uh.." I could tell I was overstepping my boundaries. I debated if I should tell her about what happened in Ancient Runes.

I decided not to. It's not that I don't trust Angelica, but it seemed like the Blacks were a touchy subject for her, and I didn't want to scare her away by saying that I might be _one_ of them.

"I'm trying to do my research on Pureblood families," I lied and Angelica nodded.

"Well.. The Black family was part of the sacred twenty-eight. Since they were, they were obsessed with the idea of keeping their blood pure. They're one of the largest Pureblooded families for that reason, but there's not that many Pureblood families left so they decided.. to start inbreeding.."

"Ew," I scrunch my face.

"Yeah. I had that same reaction when my parents told me. They're also very prejudiced.. You know Draco Malfoy?"

"Everyone knows Malfoy."

"His mother was a Black."

"That explains a lot," I said as I thought about how prejudiced Draco is.

"It really does. Honestly, the person you should ask about this is Alex but.. I don't think you should mention it to him. Hera's a Pureblood, right? Why don't you mention it to her?"

From what I know about Hera's home life, she probably knows just as little as I do.

"Uh, sure. I will. I have one more question."

"If it's about who did the inbreeding, I don't know that."

I shake my head. "No, no. Not that. What's the deal with Sirius Black? Why'd he get put in Azkaban and why did he escape?"

"He got put in for killing muggles and this one guy.. I can't remember his name but.. My parents always said he wasn't a death eater. My parents were death eaters so they uh.. they would know," Angelica laughed slightly to hide the pain on her face. "I don't know why he escaped, but if my parents are wrong then he's probably with You-Know-Who right now."

I opened my mouth to reply, but after Angelica and I turned the corner, we saw a large group of students all surrounded by a wall.

"Estella! Estella!" Hannah Abbot ran up to me frantically.

"What's going on?" I asked her and she pulled me into the crowd of people.

"This means the band can't practice anymore!" Luke announced, which made Alex and Reggie appear behind him.

Why can't the band practice anymore?

I don't know how, but we somehow managed to make it to the front, where I saw the sign that was making everyone look bothered.

**'Any students found to have formed, or to belong to, an Organization, Society, Team, Group, or Club that has not been approved by the High Inquisitor will be expelled.'**

It was signed by Umbridge. Just when I thought I couldn't dislike her even more, she does and pulls _this_.

"This means whatever, you know, wanted to do, we can't do it anymore," Hannah exasperated.

"I think it's still his finale decision," I say, not paying attention while reading the sign again. "She's including Quidditch too!" I groan. "Does Herbert know?"

"Don't know."

I sighed. "Okay. You go and find Harry and I'll go and find Herbert."

Hannah and I broke apart to go and find the people we needed to find. _I haven't even been able to play a Quidditch game yet_...

•

Harry's defense group was still happening. Hannah and Ernie approached me earlier telling me where Harry told them to meet.

Herbert was able to get permission for Quidditch, which was good.

Now, I'm in a room in the castle I've never been in with a group of people I've never been seen with.

Everyone was chattering, and I was looking for Flynn. I needed to talk to her about what happened in Caleb's class today. She's a Pureblood as well, so maybe she can tell me more...

"This is the place we've found for practices, and you've — er — obviously found it okay," Harry announced, sounding slightly nervous.

I ended up finding Flynn, but the seat next to her was occupied by Julie. I found Hera next and sat down next to her as Harry and Hermione were talking to the group. I greeted Hera as they were starting to talk about names for the group.

"Yeah, the D.A's good," said Ginny Weasley. "Only let's make it stand for Dumbledore's Army because that's the Ministry's worst fear, isn't it?"

I laughed at that, and a lot of the group did too.

The group of us voted and then Harry began going over what we're learning.

"Right. Shall we get practicing then? I was thinking, the first thing we should do is _Expelliarmus_ you know, the disarming spell."

"I think you know that spell pretty well," I whisper to Hera and she smacked my arm.

"I don't think _Expelliarmus_ is exactly going to help us against You-Know-Who, do you?" Zacharias complained.

Why is he here if he's just going to complain the entire time? He did this at Hogshead too.

"I've used it against him," Said Harry quietly. "It saved my life back in June. But if you think it's beneath you, you can leave."

I had expected Zacharias to walk out the door, but he didn't move. Nor did anyone else.

"Okay... I reckon we divide into pairs and practice." Harry instructed and I stood up.

"Don't you want to partner up with Luke?" I ask Hera with a cheeky grin before looking over at Luke, who was looking longingly at Hera.

"No. I do not."

"I think he wants you to partner up with him."

"I'm good," Hera said sternly.

"Okay. Okay. I need to talk to you about Professor Covington after this-"

"Stella!" Laddie interrupted us.

"Hello," I reply.

"Can I talk to you after?" He asked me the same thing I just asked Hera, but it's most definitely not about the same thing.

"Uh.." I looked over at Hera, who was looking at George Weasley.

"I'm gonna go partner up with George," Hera announced before speeding over to him. I don't think she's talked to him since..

"Yeah, I guess," I tell Laddie who nodded, looking satisfied.

"Do you need a partner?" He asked and I looked around for anyone else.

"What happened to Alex?"

"He partnered up with Luke. He wants to get revenge on him for turning his hair black."

"I don't think _Expelliarmus_ is the spell for that-"

Laddie put his finger over his mouth. "Shhh! Don't let him hear you."

I laugh and walk over to an area away from the chairs. I guess Laddie is my partner now.

We stand a few feet away from each other and I keep my eye contact locked with his, we both raise our wands but I was able to yell ' _Expelliarmus_ ' before he could.

Apparently, there _is_ such a thing as casting that spell with too much force, because not only did Laddie's hand fly out of his hand, but he also dramatically fell to the ground.

You know what? That also could've just been Laddie being dramatic.

I speed walk over to him and pick up his wand before extending my hand in front of his face. "You good?"

"Yeah," He grabbed my hand and I helped him up. "You cast a mean _Expelliarmus_."

"I had no clue that spell could even be that intense. Wanna go again?"

Laddie nodded and I handed him his wand before backing up to my original spot. I could see in his eyes that he looked more determined this time. Maybe I hurt his ego a little bit.

" _Expelliarmus_!" He yelled before me and my wand went flying out of my hand.

I looked at my wand on the ground before looking back over at Laddie. "I hope that helped with the bruise on your ego."

"Yes, it did actually," He grinned and I rolled my eyes, picking my wand up, ready to try again.

•

**in·her·i·tance**

**\ in-ˈher-ə-tən(t)s \**

**"something that is or may be inherited"**

•

**_h.s._ **

If there was one thing I was wanting to avoid since the weekend, it was Luke. But, now, as I stood in the Room of Requirement, trying to find my partner for the day...I couldn't help but notice his stare in my peripheral.

I eventually caught up to George Weasley, the fiery haired twin that I hadn't talked to since last Christmas time.

"What's up, danger?" Using his old nickname I had given him, I approached him with a grin, seeing Luke's disappointed look from the corner of my eye.

It took George a second to realize I was talking to him, shooing Fred away before turning to me with a wide eyed expression,"Well, hey," he crossed his arms,"long time no see."

"Yeah, you could say that," I glanced over to Stella who had partnered up with Laddie, my expression soured,"So..picked a partner yet?"

"I was going to ask Fred but from the way you're talking to me, I'll go ahead and say you were going to ask me," he glanced around the room as if looking for something,"which is odd considering there's multitudes of people you probably would rather talk to than me."

"Let's just say I'm trying to avoid a certain someone," I didn't look back at Luke but I knew he was still looking at me,"Plus, we haven't talked since..."

I trailed off but George laughed, raising his eyebrows as he nodded,"The Yule Ball. Yeah, I remember."

I blinked a few times, wondering if we should have talked about it. If I should've talked to him after.

"I'm..." I froze, he crossed his arms as he paid attention.

What could I have said? There was a lot. I wanted so badly to apologize or something, acknowledge what happened.

"Why don't we start?" Is what I said instead.

He just nodded, pulling his wand out of his robes,"Way ahead of you."

He grinned, I rolled my eyes.

I pulled my wand out before we stood a few feet in front of each other, staring each other down for a minute before I channeled all my energy and yelled out," _Expelliarmus_!"

His wand flew out of his hand but I blinked a few times. It had only skidded a few feet away and came out of my wand more like a puny "poof" rather than a loud explosive "crack". Why wasn't it as powerful as last time when I attacked Umbridge?

George laughed as he retrieved his wand and used my distracted state to his advantage," _Expelliarmus_!"

My wand flew out of my hand and hit the wall behind me, making me yelp as it had made a splintering sound and I wondered if it broke.

Luckily, when I picked it up, it seemed fine. I glared at George and he just shrugged,"C'mon, Hera, where's the energy you used with Umbridge?"

I glared at him.

_I don't know, George. Maybe I don't want to know.._

"Buried deep in my hatred for her," I grumbled before I took in a deep breath before expelling all of it," _Expelliarmus_!"

His wand didn't even nearly leave his hand, it fell on the ground this time with a sound of a spatula hitting a kitchen floor and didn't even skid across the floor at all.

I knew in that moment something was off.But what?

•

_**October 16, 1995** _

_**Monday** _

•

I entered Ancient Runes with determination in my veins, sitting at the front of the class while I waited for the class to fill up.

Today, the Ravenclaws had this class with the Gryffindors which made me want to groan thinking if the twins were going to be here or not.

I pulled a book out of my bag and I wrinkled my nose when I realized I didn't recognize it. It was a fairly worn copy of Salem's Lot by Stephen King, I flipped open the cover and I saw a note.

_Hey,_

_I put this in your bag during you-know-what, I thought you'd like this book and it could served as a truce so we can finally talk about what happened._

_I miss talking to you, Hera. I still like you if that's what you're worried about._

_Love, Luke._

I sighed in grievance as I licked my lips and started flipping through the pages, noticing his little footnotes and folds in certain places. His handwriting was as messy as ever and I couldn't help and melt at his thoughts and ideas.

"Fun read?" I look up from my mind palace, grimacing when I see Laddie staring down at me.

"What makes you ask that?" I put Luke's note in between the pages I had stopped reading.

"You're blushing," he sounded like he was amused with seeing me weak like that,"Who knew that Anahera Sincaid could get so distracted by a _boy_?"

He sat next to me and I stared at him like he was insane,"And who knew that Ladan Viziri," he winced at the name, making me want to laugh,"would voluntarily talk to me and sit with me, for that matter?"

"I want to watch the world burn," he shrugged, leaning back in his chair suavely like anyone would actually notice,"didn't you know?"

"No, I've known since first year when you set fire to McGonagall's robes by mistake," he frowned as I titled my head at the door, seeing the Weasley twins enter as if on cue,"Fred and George were impressed. Didn't you get two months detention for that?"

His face started turning red,"I-"

"Well, well, if it isn't Lads," Fred rounded our desk in Laddie's direction while George came around my end,"Tormenting Hera as always."

"Have you gotten taller?" George came behind Laddie and laughed,"Or are you still using that lie that you're five foot ten?"

Laddie's ears started turning red but he kept his cool surprisingly,"Just remember that I'm older than you two by four months."

"Tell that to whoever rationed out heights to everyone," George leaned forward and put his elbows on the desk beside me,"They probably need to be reminded, huh?"

He inclined toward me and whispered,"He annoying you?"

I shrugged,"I'd prefer to sit with you or Fred, honestly."

"Then why don't you tell him to bugger off?" George was genuinely confused and I raised my eyebrows.

"Not a bad idea, I guess, but I'm feeling extra nice today...besides," I leaned closer to him, noticing his eyes looking me up and down, knowing we hadn't been that close since...awhile,"It'll be fun, don't you think?"

He smirked,"Then let the games begin."

•

During the rest of the duration of class, Fred and George gave Laddie a hell of a time. Whether it was throwing stuff at him or using spells to pull at his robes or punch him...it was funny.

Of course, he couldn't say anything since Professor Covington was teaching so he'd get in trouble if he distracted the class at all.

By the end, Laddie looked like he wanted to explode, his face bright red and his fists clenched tightly.

"Wow, you look stressed," I let out a slight laugh after he glared at me like he wanted to stare a hole through my skull.

"I blame you for them," he flicked his head toward Fred and George to let me know he meant the twins,"They wouldn't have done that stuff throughout class if you-"

"Yeah, yeah, I'm a terrible human," I made the "shoo" gesture,"Go find Alex to annoy or something."

He rolled his eyes in annoyance as he gathered his things and left, the twins gravitating towards me once he left the door.

"We do you proud?" Fred asked, the mischievous sparkle in his eye I could always count on.

"Of course we did," George rubbed it in, leaning his elbow on my desk,"Laddie looked like he was about to unleash hell on us."

"Maybe you two should watch your backs, I hear he has a bad ass roundhouse kick," I giggled as I watched people leave one by one.

"Are you not leaving now?" George asked, concern painting his face.

"I have to talk to Caleb about something really quick."

The twins grimaced when I said the name.

"Why do you call him that?" Fred wrinkled his nose.

"What?"

" _Caleb_. You know he has a last name like the other professors, right? Like Snape and McGonagall."

"I don't know, Caleb sounds better than Covington," I started putting my things in my bag to avoid the conversation and I heard the wheels turn in George's head before his eyes sparkled and I knew it clicked.

"This wouldn't have anything to do with your little schoolgirl crush on him, would it?" He looked like he had just solved the biggest mystery of all time with the grin on his face wide like an insane supervillain.

"No." But I couldn't fool him. He knew too much.

"How long has it been since you were so _infatuated_ with him? Like two, three years?" He knelt down to my height,"Around the same time that you and I-"

"Miss Sincaid," I turn to see Caleb calling for me,"you were wanting to see me?"

I blinked, wondering how he knew before I nodded,"Uh, yes, sir."

"Well, let's get it over with, I have a meeting with Malachi later," he shuffled through some homework sheets as he spoke.

I glanced at Fred and George and they both backed up with their hands up in surrender before leaving the two of us alone, George wiggled his eyebrow before the door shut and I made a sour face.

"What is it, Miss Sincaid?" Caleb sounded almost annoyed.

"Uh, I wanted to ask you about something in particular that I never knew about the First Wizarding War."

"And why would I, an ancient runes professor, know about details of the First Wizarding War?" He looked down at me, almost as if he couldn't believe I dared to ask him,"Why don't you ask a magical history professor?"

"Because, sir, it's not really details. It's well-known but I had no clue until as of recently," he nodded and hummed in response, not giving a care in the world,"What do you know about Death Eaters?"

He stopped instantly what he was doing and stared at me intently, a smile forming on his lips. He was interested now.

" _Oh_? Is that all?" He seemed intrigued I'd ask, like I'd know everything about them,"Why are you asking?"

He leaned back on his desk, his hands on the table behind him as they propped him up so he wouldn't fall, a very good demeanor to show he was powerful and he could squash you like a bug if he could.

"I had just never heard of them before so I was only curious," I was being half honest. I had never heard of them and I was curious but..it wasn't the only reason why.

"Well," he bounded his way towards the desk I was sitting at,"They were You-Know-Who's followers. People who killed with no hesitation for him and did anything his heart desired.."

He stopped directly in front of the desk and leaned forward,"I'm quite surprised you never know about them. Your father had a _particular_ interest in them back in the day."

I wanted to know what he meant but only one thought kept entering my mind,"You knew my dad?"

"Oh, yes, he was in fifth year when I joined Hogwarts," he sat on top of my desk, crossing his legs dramatically,"A handsome young lad. Never really talked much to others and didn't have many friends either. I would try and be friends with him but he was mean and distant.."

I furrowed my eyebrows, knowing those exact traits from him all too well. I noticed Caleb glancing down at me with a peculiar smile.

"You know, you remind me quite a bit of him," he giggled like it was the funniest thing in the world. But I didn't think so.

I jumped out of my seat, "I am _not_ like him."

I spat out, a taste of bitterness filling my mouth with the idea,"I will never be like him."

"Oh?" Caleb jumped off the desk, crossing his arms and raising his eyebrows,"Have you found that you're better with spells when you're angry? When you're passionate with feelings you can't control?"

I felt my breath get caught up in my throat, a feeling of hopelessness filling my system as I blinked in denial,"I..."

I couldn't find the words to describe what I wanted to him. But a smirk on his face told me everything I needed to know.

The anger that enveloped me like the time with Umbridge was inherited. It was from my father.

"So, what do I do?" I sounded desperate but I didn't care. I didn't want to be my dad, not now or ever.

He shrugged,"It's just uncontrollable anger, a fire that can never be put out once it is started."

He was having way too much fun with this as he turned to his desk with a skip,"It goes away eventually but not without leaving some burns."

I felt a sigh of defeat come out of me and I knew I was done.

"I have one more question before I leave," I glance into his neon blue eyes, almost boring into my soul like a power drill,"Was my dad...a Death Eater?"

Caleb chuckled wickedly, an evil noise at the back of his throat that could make even the most diabolical people shiver in his presence.

"Oh, my dear, you don't even know the half of what your father was capable of."


End file.
